Los Angeles Times

She’s not willing to be 4th best for him

- Send questions to Amy Dickinson by email to askamy@tribune.com.

Dear Amy: I’m an older attractive single woman. I’m in good shape for my age.

I met someone; it was love at first sight for both of us.

He and I emailed each other continuall­y and also hooked up a couple of times and now have been seeing each other regularly. My problem is he has a live-in girlfriend of 20 years.

He told me about her midway through the emailing stage of our relationsh­ip. I nearly ended it then but didn’t. They have an open relationsh­ip. She knows about me and encourages him to do what makes him happy.

I don’t share this philosophy. I would rather be with someone who does not have a girlfriend already.

I know he’s not going to leave her for me. I don’t want to live with someone at this time, but I do want someone special in my life.

He says not to try to make things work but to let them work and not to stress over things you can’t control, including him.

His job is No. 1, his girlfriend No. 2, fitness No. 3, and I’m No. 4 on his list of priorities. Should I end it?

Number Four Dear Four: There’s a reason championsh­ip teams don’t yell “We’re No. 4!”

You should end this relationsh­ip while you still have a shred of self-esteem.

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