Toeing the line with socks
Guys, although you’ve been wearing socks longer than you’ve been able to walk, there’s a pretty good chance you’re doing it wrong — all wrong. That’s the conceit of “Socks: The Rule Book” ( its subtitle, “10 essential rules for the wearing and appreciation of men’s hosiery”) by Sock Club of London ( Mitchell Beazley, $ 12.99), which is available Tuesday.
The first rule of sock club, as you might suspect coming from a club built around the joy of socks, is that they should always be worn. “Socks must be worn for all occasions where clothing is appropriate,” reads Rule No. 1, “and in some instances even when it is not.” ( In other words, during your naked times, you might want to consider socks.)
Notwithstanding, that is, Rule No. 7, which answers the big “Should I wear socks with sandals?” question with an unequivocal answer: “No.”
The other eight rules tackle topics such as care and storage ( Rule No. 2, in which it is suggested you arrange your sock drawer by color and fold them instead of rolling them up into a ball); the use of patterns and prints ( Rule No. 5, which includes the observation, “The general rule of sock here is that the narrower the stripe, the more formal the look …” ); and onthe- road hosiery management ( Rule No. 9 lobbies for a dedicated, hard- sided sock case for trips longer than a week, with a sock pouch sufficient for shorter jaunts).
While these rules easily could have been shared via a listicle or a blog post or maybe a humorous poster that riffs on the Ten Commandments (“Thou shalt not wear socks with sandals” — that sort of thing), what makes the topic worthy of a full- blown book is the collection of factoids socked away on the richly illustrated pages.
There are excursions into hosiery history ( Who knew that in AD 1000 wearing socks was a way of showing off wealth? Or that an Eng- lish chap named William Lee invented the stocking frame- knitting machine in 1589?); sock anatomy ( where you’ll learn the difference between a heel flap and a heel turn, for example); and a handful of life hacks ( among them, mending a toe hole is more easily accomplished by turning the sock inside out and pulling it over a light bulb before sewing).
Sure, you’d probably be able to make it through life without learning how to hand- wash your hosiery or pull off a pair of seasonal socks. But what “Socks: The Rule Book” helps do is give men a chance to get a well- dressed leg up on the competition and potentially put their best feet forward every single day.