ASK AMY

Dear Amy: I am reaching an end-stage of life. I have multiple children and grandchildren who are adults.

Many years ago, I became aware that my wife, now deceased, had an affair with a man we knew at that time.

She became pregnant and bore a child who could have been the child of the other man or my child. From appearances alone, I suspect the other man is the father.

I feel certain that if I am not the father, sometime in the future DNA testing will reveal that fact. I’ve always treated this child as my own.

Should I broach this matter with my child now, or let the future happen as it may?

Wondering Dear Wondering: You should lovingly tell your adult child the truth. Assure them that they are and always will be your child, and that you adore and love them as only a father can.

Give them plenty of space and time to process this information.

Encourage your child to pursue this as much — or as little — as they choose, and reassure them that you are there, every step of the way.