She’s a happy solo traveler

Dear Amy: I love to travel. It’s almost an obsession, and age (I’m over 80) has not dulled my desire to GO. I had a good job and saved so I could travel in retirement.

My husband has lost a lot of his wanderlust, and will only go if I beg and plead.

To keep us both happy, I take one or two trips a year by myself. I’ve learned to enjoy being alone for a couple of weeks without having to worry about anyone else and what they might want to do.

I’m happy to get home at the end of each trip, because I do miss my husband.

My problem is with girlfriends who keep asking to come with me.

At my age, a large portion of my girlfriends are either divorced or widowed.

I like all of them or they wouldn’t be my friends — but there are very few that I’d want to travel and be with for a couple of weeks. Some are inclined to be negative, some talk all the time (I read in the evening) and many complain about their health.

What do I say to stop this constant haranguing?

I invited one very easygoing lady, with whom I’ve been friends since the age of 3, to join us for part of our current trip.

I posted a picture of the three of us on FB, and one woman was so upset that she hadn’t been invited that she canceled a visit with her that I had planned long ago.

Should I just stop talking about upcoming travels?

S

Dear S: It is unwise to post about your travels while you are away. There are practical reasons for this (the first being not to telegraph the fact that you are not at your home). Being discreet about your travels also spares you from the burden of your friends’ hurt feelings.

Savvy people save their social media posts for after they’ve returned home, unpacked their bags and edited their photos.

You should not let people guilt you into including them on your travels.

You are not a tour guide. You are the travel agent of your own life.

If you sincerely believe people are “constantly haranguing” you, then tell them, “I’m firm about this, so I wish you’d stop asking.” But people have the right to ask anything of you. You might have to say, “No, that wouldn’t work for me,” every time. You might suggest to these friends that they consider booking a tour or a cruise and travel together.

Road Scholar is a nonprofit organizing tours and experiences for elders. You might recommend this to your circle of eager travelers.

Dear Amy:

My older sister is very successful and kind. She has a habit that makes me feel resentful, however.

Whenever she gets a new piece of furniture, she pawns off her old stuff on me. Many of the things she has dropped off at my (rental) house were pawned off on her back in the day.

I came home recently to find in my garage a 40-yearold Barcalounger that we’ve all hated for decades.

My sister behaves as if she is doing me a favor, but I have everything I need.

What should I do? Not Sitting Pretty

Dear Not Sitting:

You could play this out by photoshopping the Barcalounger in various settings and texting your sister taunting photos about how this chair is now living its best life — but not with you.

You could post it on Freecycle or Facebook, or call your local Goodwill (or other donation/resale site) and ask them to pick it up.