Wife devastated to learn of husband’s prior conquests

DEAR ABBY: I met my husband on the job when we were one year out of school. We are both 36. We dated for three years and were compatible in every way. Ten years later, we have two kids (7 and 5), own a home and are financially secure.

When we dated, we discussed our “history,” and he told me that he’d had five prior girlfriends. I had three boyfriends in college. Well, I learned a few months ago -- at his reunion -- that he completely “forgot” the part about his competitive frat-boy past with hook-ups and one-night stands. He now estimates that he was with over 50 different girls during college, but says it “shouldn’t bother me” because it was meaningless sex and in the past. He said he told me “five” because they were the ones he counted as relationships.

Now I see women on his social media who went to the same school and I obsess about how they fit into his past.

by Bigar

(March 21-April 19): This is a creative, playful, fun-loving day! However, most of this day is a Moon Alert (see above); therefore, restrict your spending to food and gas. Write down your clever, original ideas. Enjoy socializing, sports and fun times with kids. Tonight: Just coast.

(April 20-May 20): You might want to cocoon at home today and have a let-your-hair-down conversation with a relative. This might be a good idea. However, note the Moon Alert (see above) and agree to nothing. Don’t volunteer for anything or agree to anything important. Tonight: Private time.

(May 21-June 20): Today you’re excited about ideas, which means you might agree to something or make a big decision. Not good! Check the Moon Alert times above. Don’t agree to anything important today. Don’t shop. (Except for food.) However, it’s a creative day! Tonight: Socialize!

(June 21-July 22): Today there is a Moon Alert for most of the day in one of your Money Houses, which means don’t spend money on anything other than food or gas. Do not make important decisions, especially financial ones. Tonight: Just cruise.

(July 23-Aug. 22): For most of this day, the Moon is in your sign; however, it is a Moon Alert. This means you might feel indecisive. However, you will also be creative because your mind is free to think outside the box and come up with original concepts and ideas. Tonight: Write down your creative ideas.

(Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Today, you might have a vague feeling that things are getting away from you. You can’t put your finger on it, but everything is fuzzy. That’s because most of this day is a Moon Alert (see above.) Be smart and restrict spending to food and gas. Forewarned is forearmed. Tonight: Don’t shop.

(Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Today you might have a confidential heart-to-heart talk with someone, probably a friend or a member of a group. This discussion might relate to creative, artistic stuff. Great! Kick around ideas and build on them; however, wait until tomorrow to act. Tonight: Chill.

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21): This is a tricky day because you are high-viz, which means people notice you more than usual. Nevertheless, because most of this day is a Moon Alert, you might feel indecisive or unsure about something, which is OK. Do not act today. Tonight: Don’t shop.

(Nov. 22-Dec. 21): This is a creative day if you are working on anything that requires an imagination. However, it’s a poor day for important legal decisions or important decisions related to medicine. Explore ideas but

It’s driving me crazy, and I feel like just a number now. I know if this situation were reversed, he’d flip out about it.

I wish I had never found this out because I see him differently now, and no longer want to be close to him. He’s a good father and husband, but I’m struggling with how to accept this new information, and I need some guidance. – WISH I DIDN’T KNOW

DEAR WISH: People usually lie because they aren’t proud of the truth. You say he has been a good husband and father. This is why you need to find it in your heart to forgive him. If you have caught him in lies since then, you have a reason to be reacting the way you have. However, if you haven’t, please consider talking with a licensed marriage and family therapist until you have worked it through. The resentment you feel could destroy your marriage. Please do not let that happen.

Astrology

wait until tomorrow to act on them. Ditto for making travel plans. Tonight: Write down good ideas.

(Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Today a Moon Alert is taking place in one of your Money Houses, which means this is an especially poor day to make important decisions about loans, mortgages, banking matters, shared property, inheritances or insurance issues. Tonight: Wait until tomorrow to act.

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Today the Moon is opposite your sign, which means you have to go more than halfway when dealing with others. This is not a big deal; it simply requires courtesy, patience and accommodation. Don’t volunteer for anything. Wait until tomorrow. Tonight: Listen to others.

(Feb. 19-March 20): You have a strong focus on home, plus this is also a creative, fun-loving time for you. Enjoy socializing and playful activities with kids. Know that your efficiency at work will suffer today because of the Moon Alert, which is fuzzy and prone to shortages. Tonight: Low-key socializing.