Parent wonders why bedtime rules aren’t enforced at sleepovers

Dear Carolyn: Not so much a question as a rant: Why do parents hosting sleepovers refuse to enforce any type of bedtime? My fourthgrader was invited to a sleepover, but I refused to let him go because at the last one, according to the host, the kids stayed up until 2 or 3. What’s up with that? I know everyone has different rules, but still. I guess I should be thankful they don’t let kids play with knives (I think).

— Ranting

Ranting: Some treat sleepovers as a chance for kids to push limits in a contained, low-risk setting, which has its advantages. As long as the kids’ safety is paramount and the parents are transparent about what they permit, I think it’s OK for different families to have different hosting styles (when the COVID 19 crisis passes, of course).

Readers’ reminiscences: — At my best friend’s house, we would stay up sometimes until 4 a.m. Those are still some of my fondest memories of my childhood. Lighten up and relinquish the bedtime control every now and then!

— Some of my fondest childhood memories involve sleepovers with late nights of Star Wars watching or Nintendo 64 playing, accompanied by mounds of M&Ms or gummy bears. And

I am now a functional adult. It’s a special occasion, let the kids enjoy themselves.

— I’m of two minds. I also have great memories of staying up way too late with friends when I was a kid. I’m guardian to my granddaughter who is a MONSTER if she is sleep-deprived. I agree to sleepovers only if the following day is free and clear and she promises to take at least one very long nap.

— I think it is worth something for kids to realize that staying up all night, while it sounds fun, sucks the next day. My daughter still talks about the time she and her BFF stayed up watching YouTube until the wee hours and “we won’t do that again.”

— From bedtime to knives. That escalated quickly.

Kids these days.