Happiness is a matter of the lens through which you view it
Rosemary Schmidt tells the story of a teacher asking a young John Lennon what he wanted to be when he grew up.
“Happy,” said Lennon. The teacher told Lennon he did not understand the question. Lennon told the teacher she did not understand life.
Whether Lennon, the “Peanuts” character Linus or Goldie Hawn is actually the subject of the anecdote is not as important as society’s rightful infatuation with being happy in life — and doing all one can to achieve it.
Schmidt does her part in offering a number of theories and suggestions in
“The Happy Clam,” a short, sweet book that the judges panel for the Independent Business Publishers Association’s Franklin Book Award likened to “a long conversation with your really smart best friend.”
Schmidt often says that her first book, “Go Forward Support!,” a discourse on the sport of rugby and the life lessons it distills, is about staying a child for as long as possible, and that “The Happy Clam” is about being an adult. Well, yes and no. “Go Forward Support!” does focus on a game most often but not always played by a younger, more athletic generation, but the lessons apply for those of all ages.
In “The Happy Clam,” Schmidt combines a plethora of research from books, articles, studies and even teabags with much more personal reflections about not only her own happiness but her habits, hobbies, relationships, struggles and outlets in search of a harmonious existence.
Strangely, she observes that happiness is most often thought of and measured by the past (those were the best of times) and future (looking forward to good times) and not so much appreciated in the here and now. And that’s why she says happiness is so elusive — it is always moving. “You can see it ahead of you and behind you, but you don’t even realize it when you are right in the very midst of it.”
According to Schmidt, happiness is not so much a function of the hand you’ve been dealt as it is about the lens through which you view that hand — “what your mind’s eye chooses to focus on.” And can that lens be adjusted? Her answer is a resounding yes — but it isn’t easy.
The book offers a variety of suggestions on one’s bigger picture frame of mind (getting plenty of sleep, eating properly, exercising, nurturing friends and relationships) to paying attention to the little things that can be the roots of happiness: pets, plants, aromas, music, paintings, a sense of order (making your bed, paying your bills), and more. Even the physical act of smiling is in Schmidt’s happiness playbook.
The author devotes time to her sister and her mother, both of whom died since she wrote her first book, as well as her professional role as a supervisor, and the struggles and choices people make that affect their peace of mind. She also offers a chapter of cooking recipes that translate into many of her feel-good moments.
The advice in this book, says Schmidt, “is intended for the day-to-day gardenvariety unhappiness ruts, but maybe it helps lift people enough that they avoid falling into the deep wells of depression.”
So what makes Schmidt an authority on the topic? Perhaps, the fact that she doesn’t have any medical background, that her job title is nothing like Chief Happiness Officer, makes her observations more practical, relatable and honed from first-hand experience of being down herself and finding her way through. It is this “everyman” approach that works so succinctly and productively, along with her fine writing style and storytelling ability, to open her offerings to one and all. That’s why readers are apt to find this book so useful and helpful.
Funny thing, this feeling we call happiness. We all want it, crave it, but what does it take to get it? Regardless of where or how you hear it, all the research, analysis and introspection boil down to one simple truth: “If we act happy, we might actually feel happier as a result.”
Give that idea — and this book — a try. Who knows, maybe you’ll be happy as a clam.