GWYN’S GOT SEX ON THE BRAIN
AMERICA’S most cringeworthy mom just can’t keep her mouth shut about her oral skills, sex toys and intimate life! Ever since Gwyneth Paltrow launched her controversial wellness site Goop in September 2008, the 47-year-old has been bragging about her naughty bits! 2020
Our gal Gwyneth, who didn’t respond to a request for comment, got a head start on sex when she met Rob Lowe’s wife, Sheryl Berkoff, while still a teenager:
“She taught me how to give a blow job, and you know, all the classic
Sheryl stuff … I implemented it the first chance I got!” 2020
There’s NOTHING private about Gwyneth’s private parts! Her $75 candle called “This Smells Like
My Orgasm” smells like — “tart grapefruit, neroli, and ripe cassis berries blended with gunpowder tea and Turkish rose!” 2020 Lockdown is lonely — but not if you study self-stimulation the Gwyneth way, by whipping out a special vibration for those who love “tongue action.” 2020
On Jimmy Kimmel’s show, Gwyneth said her son told her: “At first I thought it was really embarrassing that there were vibrators on your website, and now I think it’s a great
thing!” 2018
Gwynnie thoughtfully addressed such thorny sex problems as how to arrange a threesome: “Whether tantra or BDSM or threesomes or vanilla are your thing will never be the point — knowing yourself” is the key!
2017 Gwyneth provided step-by-step instructions for how to leave the missionary position behind, by “helping the receiving partner train her anal sphincters to relax!” 2016
For the “Shakespeare in Love” lovely, only a
$15,000 gold dildo will do! Her list of bedside must-haves included a
$535 whip and a $395 “discreet vibrating necklace that turns into nipple clamps.” 2015
Gwyneth got mouthy with Howard Stern when the radio shock jock said “a lot of guys are insecure” about dating famous women: “It depends on how many blow jobs you give them!”
2015 Some said Gwyneth’s advice to steam clean your
not in your best interests — but the Goop Girl insisted it made her uterus squeaky clean! 2013
Comedian-actress Chelsea Handler described how her pal Paltrow advised someone having marital problems: “Go at him with love and you give him a blow job!’’