Avoid getting ‘Married’
THERE MAY not be a sillier or more preposterous movie on TV this year than “I Married Who?”
Kellie Martin, a good actress, plays Jordan Grady, a responsible woman who is a few days away from marrying a responsible man, Peter Drake (Bradley Snedeker).
They have a responsible life ahead of them. T hen, metaphor ically acting for all of us, Jordan’s girlfriends Claire (Adrienne Frantz) and Jessica (Daphnee Duplaix) decide Jordan should have a little fun, and they take her to Vegas for a bach-elorette girls’ weekend.
Peter cautions her that whatever she does, she can’t drink. She assures him she won’t.
Then the girls are all at the table and the drinks get switched. Before you know it, Jordan wakes up the next morning with a hangover and a wedding ring.
Across the room is Matt Swift (Ethan Erickson), a dreamboat who really isn’t to blame, because she left her engagement ring at home with Peter for safekeeping.
Oh, Matt is also a movie star.
Don’t try counting the implausible elements here or you’ll get a bigger hangover than Jordan’s.
Anyhow, the rest of the movie is devoted to first complicating and then resolving the situation. If anyone can’t guess with whom Jordan will end up, we certainly won’t spoil the surprise.
At the end, all this said, there’s one other truth: While watching this movie may be the equivalent of eating puffed air, it will still do less violence to your brain than all of the “Real Housewives.”
dhinckley@nydailynews.com