On tourney TV, school’s out
By all appearances, March Madness provides a unique opportunity for sharing ideas, opinions and analysis concerning the world of college basketball. There is no other event with five — count ’em — five national networks at its daily disposal. It also comes with a microphone army equipped to suck the air out of living rooms from coast to coast. The battalion of play-byplay mouths and sidekick analysts is amplified by two basically around-the-clock studio operations.
Yet even with this formidable ear-bending assemblage, bought and paid for by the suits at CBS and Turner Sports, there are pertinent — some critical — issues that will be ignored and not discussed.
For the NCAA men’s basketball tournament is really just a Happy Fizzies Party, a moolah-centric (we’re talking billions) escape for the unwashed masses lost in a bracket haze. They could care less that the lifeblood of the event — the players — don’t share one cent of the revenue.
See, there are things you won’t see or hear, things that would intrude on this fantasy world, rudely interrupting it.
Such as a discussion on gambling. It fuels the engine of March Madness. Billions of dollars change hands. Some of those “hands” are dirty. Nonetheless, all the betting and Aunt Tilly’s brackets generate the tourney’s TV ratings. Don’t expect Kenny Smith or Clark Kellogg to enlighten us on this matter.
An aside: Those advertisements for fantasy wagering sites FanDuel and DraftKings don’t have much of a presence during this tourney. What a difference a year, and legal entanglements, make, right?
Okay, could someone remind us why Louisville is not in the tournament? Don’t think any of the participating mouths will be touching this one. It would mean bringing up the seamy side of a program where recruits were allegedly paired up with hookers employed to entice them to commit to this University of higher education.
This all came as a surprise to coach Rick Pitino, who maintains he was not aware of any dormitory debauchery.
Uh, don’t expect Greg Gumbel to be “teasing” that story prior to any of CBS’ “At the Half” segments. Nor do we expect Pitino to make any cameo appearances as a “guest” analyst during the tournament.
Expect minimal — if any — references to academics. When it comes to March Madness, grades are highly overrated. Who cares if a student-athlete misses a few classes to participate in a game at one of the regional sites?
And if Ian (The Bird) Eagle and Len Elmore actually do care about this issue, we highly doubt they were encouraged to squeeze it in during Thursday’s Duke-North Carolina Wilmington first-rounder.
If you are looking for a solid proposition wager, bet the under on how many times a voice mentions what a player’s “major” is. Also, bet the under (this is a lock) on how many times a player’s GPA is presented on screen. March Madness telecasts reveal little about the school side of school, even if it means highlighting a positive and reporting on academic success.
Why waste time with such trivial information when an analyst can put the time to better use — like deifying a coach? Anyone watching the tournament over the years already knows Mike Krzyzewski, John Calipari and Bill Self are not mere mortals. They are God-like figures, anointed over the years by mouths like Dick Vitale and Bill Raftery.
And if a coach who has yet to sniff such rarified air (or enjoy the endorsement booty the “Gods” rake in) sees his team get hot in the tournament, he’s going to get more TV face time. The exposure will be accompanied by speculation about it being time for him to upgrade to a bigger school. His present contractual obligations are rarely discussed. Neither is the fact the coach is leaving players he recruited in the lurch.
The big picture of March Madness’ cash machine has no room for the players. Everyone involved is cashing in. Think about this: Even Reggie Miller and Kevin Harlan, broadcasters, get paid to appear in a tournamentthemed commercial, but the stars of the show, the players, don’t make a cent for participating.
Don’t expect any in-depth discussions or references to this. Any player-related “issue” conversations, concerning off-court subjects, are limited to a legal or academic problem. Or whether the player is thinking of jumping to the NBA. The rest of the stuff is mostly confined to heartwarming features focusing on a player’s background and the relationships that brought him to this point. his stuff sweetens the presentation of March Madness. It provides a smoke screen concealing any reality associated with a multibillion dollar business that continues to grow. The NCAA and its TV partners, CBS/Turner, don’t want some rogue analyst or play-byplay voice spitting what amounts to sand into their well-oiled engine. There’s no need to mess up a good thing. Even if it would mean sprinkling the light of truth over One Shining Money Grab.
T