Big-bucks divorce turns truly yuk-ky

HE’S GOT JOKES — but the wife is in no mood.

A Manhattan real estate titan eager to finalize his divorce — and willing to part with half of his $2 billion fortune — had plenty of humor to go around Wednesday as lawyers tried to hammer out a deal.

Harry Macklowe, 79, and his wife of 58 years, Linda Macklowe, continued to haggle over the terms of their divorce.

But as the teams of attorneys negotiated Harry’s hefty offer to seal the divorce, Macklowe cracked jokes for reporters in Manhattan Supreme Court.

In one, a man is beaten by his wife with a broom after she finds a note in his pants that bears the name Susan.

“Darling, I told you, I went to the racetrack and bet on Susan,” Macklowe said.

“‘The next day, the husband returned home and his wife clocks him with a frying pan. ‘Darling, why are you beating me up ?’ the husband asks.

Then Macklowe (photo) delivered the punch line — “‘Your horse called home today,’ she replies.”

Macklowe has shared other zingers on the YouTube channel of Old Jews Telling Jokes, including the one about a woman named Sarah, who is a kleptomaniac.

Not so funny were the negotiations revolved around the actual value of Harry Macklowe’s empire.

He said he was eager to move on.

“I hope she’s happy. I’m happy. I hope it’s over quickly. She initiated it,” he said. “This is serious . . . . The marriage was not as good as it should have been.”

Linda, an art-collecting trustee of the Guggenheim Foundation, filed for divorce in last June.

She waved off a News reporter while she sat in court, filling a crossword puzzle while her estranged husband sat a few seats away.

“He likes the press. I never talked to them. I have no comment,” she said.

Harry Macklowe is now engaged to Patricia Landeau, 60, who is president of the French Friends of the Israel Museum in Jerusalem.