School big busted for poop spree
ABANDON SHIP.
A gender-switched version of the 1987 Goldie Hawn/Kurt Russell comedy “Overboard” mixes up the passenger list. Now, Anna Faris gets the Russell part as a blue-collar schemer. Mexican star Eugenio Derbez takes on Hawn’s role as a spoiled snob. But none of it holds water. The revamped story has Derbez playing Leonardo, a billionaire playboy, and Faris as Kate, a struggling single mom. She shows up at the dock to shampoo his yacht’s carpeting. He insults her, refuses to pay her, and then throws her off his ship. Literally.
But after he and his crew sail away, he falls overboard, too — and washes up in her hometown with a case of amnesia.
Egged on by her pushy friend, played by Eva Longoria (inset, above left), Kate hatches a crazy scheme. She picks up Leonardo at the hospital, convinces the blank-slate guy he’s her poor devoted husband, and takes him home.
Then she gets him a construction job and loads him up with household chores. Suddenly she has an extra paycheck and childcare for her three daughters — and the extra time she needs to study for her nursing exam.
Too bad Leonardo’s crew didn’t see him and throw him a life preserver.
Too bad they didn’t see this remake’s screenwriters and throw them a few, too.
True, the original “Overboard” was no classic. If it’s remembered at all, it’s for Russell’s hunky swagger and Hawn’s very cheeky bathing suit. But at least it had a kind of low, crude honesty.
This version, though, is all bad sitcom corniness, full of obvious slap-shtick, zany music and Speedy Gonzales jokes. It boasts two scheming sisters, some supposedly sexy misunderstandings and a few musical numbers, one featuring a big guy in a dress.
It’s better than a telenovela, one character says.
No, it’s not. Telenovelas are funnier.
Faris has always had a plucky, regular-gal vibe and a lot of natural charm, and she brings them here. Which is good, because the character she’s playing is, basically, a fraud and a
Anna Faris stars in a comedy remake that runs aground. Director: Rob Greenberg. (1:52). PG-13: Strong language, brief nudity, alcohol abuse. kidnapper. And Derbez, who also produced, works very hard. Maybe too hard.
He’s certainly smart. His new film follows the same blueprints as his hit last year, “How To Be a Latin Lover.” It switches easily between English and (subtitled) Spanish. It alternates white-bread suburban gags with sharper, more topical material aimed at a Latino audience.
It’s an obvious move to break through into a larger American market. That’s fine, of course.
The problem isn’t that the jokes are meant to be diverse. It’s that they’re essentially the same — bad. For all its roleswitching and multi-culturalism, “Overboard” is as old-fashioned as every other rom-com you ever snoozed through, with hammy characters and silly situations.
Its stars may keep falling into the ocean. But it’s the film that sinks. THE SUPER was a pooper
New Jersey officials solved the puzzle of who was defecating on the Holmdel High School athletic fields when the district’s school superintendent was caught on surveillance camera copping a squat by the running track.
The camera was set up after coaches and staff members of the high school complained to the school resource officer that someone had left their calling card “on a daily basis,” the Asbury Park Press reported.
Kenilworth Public Schools Superintendent Thomas Tramaglini was arrested as the fecal fiend on Wednesday.
The latest incident took place at 5:45 a.m. on Monday, according to the newspaper.
“I don't know if it was daily, but it's been going on for a while,” an unnamed member of the community told Patch. “I heard it was at least eight times in the past few months.”
Tramaglini, a Matawan resident, was charged with lewdness, littering and defecating in public, cops said Thursday.
He was granted a leave of absence from his $150,000 a year job until the case is adjudicated.
Brian Luciani, the director of academics, will assume Tramaglini’s responsibilities.
“The Board of Education wants to assure faculty and staff, students and parents, that the district will continue its responsibilities without interruption,” Kenilworth Public Schools administrators said in a statement. “Every day, and especially during challenging times, we are fortunate to have veteran administrators and other dedicated professionals on whom we can rely.”