SPLAT’S LIFE!

Pi­geon app plops on pols, pigs and punks

New York Daily News - - NEWS - BY LARRY MCSHANE

Here’s your chance to poop on Pres­i­dent Trump. Or maybe mer­ci­less North Korean dic­ta­tor Kim Jong Un.

Or even your an­noy­ing next-door neigh­bor.

Get ready for “Pi­geon Hit Squad” — the game where the ubiq­ui­tous ur­ban birds soar through city skies, slow­ing only to poop on a va­ri­ety of generic New York City tar­gets: Street ven­dors, boom box blar­ers, politi­cians, em­bar­rass­ingly af­fec­tion­ate cou­ples.

But wait — there’s more! For a mere 99 cents, you can add any­body your heart de­sires (or de­tests) as one or more of your pi­geon’s po­ten­tial prey.

“Speak poop to power!” urges game cre­ator Christo­pher Gor­don, a life­long New Yorker who views the oft­ma­ligned pi­geon as a metaphor. Se­ri­ously. “If you think about it, pi­geons are the ul­ti­mate New York­ers,” ex­plained the 62year-old Gor­don. “They have a bird’s eye view of ev­ery­thing. They hold ev­ery­body in to­tal dis­dain.

“And if they’re an­gry with some­thing, they just poop on it.”

For­mer tele­vi­sion ex­ec­u­tive Gor­don was seek­ing a sec­ond ca­reer act in new me­dia be­fore find­ing his feath­ered muse and launch­ing the game last year.

The eas­ily-down­loaded app re­flects life in his home­town — home to 8 mil­lion peo­ple, 7 mil­lion pi­geons and the cur­rent oc­cu­pant of the White House.

But Gor­don says the game leans to­ward nei­ther red state nor blue, and passed on keep­ing a tote board chron­i­cling which pub­lic fig­ures re­ceived the most pi­geon pil­lory.

“You can’t turn on the TV with­out see­ing how di­vided and hos­tile things are,” he ex­plained. “You can’t talk with­out fear of of­fend­ing some­one. The idea was a fun way to ease frus­tra­tion and anger on a per­sonal level.

“And to do it in a way with­out get­ting ar­rested or thrown out of your apart­ment.”

Cre­at­ing an an­i­mated mark for the pi­geon’s spe­cial “Splat!” is sim­ply ac­com­plished with any cell phone photo or JPEG. Any player who adds five per­sonal tar­gets re­ceives a spe­cial “poo­pon” for a free sixth one.

The game took roughly a year to de­velop, with one false start be­fore things fell into place. Gor­don wanted some­thing sim­ple, en­ter­tain­ing and hand­held.

“I didn’t want ‘Game of Thrones’ for phones,” he said. “Who’s go­ing to sit for eight hours play­ing on a phone?”

The game, avail­able from the App Store or Google Play, has al­ready drawn coos of de­light from its fans.

“My ex-girl­friend is the worst per­son I know,” en­thused one sat­is­fied cus­tomer pic­tured on the “Hit Squad” web­site. “Now I can poop on her all day, ev­ery day,”

Gor­don be­lieves his city­cen­tric game will trans­late to play­ers from coast to coast, re­gard­less of their sur­round­ings.

“When it comes to pi­geons,” he said, “ev­ery­one’s a New Yorker.”

PI­GEON HIT SQUAD

Pi­geon Hit Squad fea­tures the fa­mil­iar fly­ing New York pest do­ing his busi­ness on Kim Jong Un (below), but for a small fee, users can in­sert an im­age of any­one they want to tar­get.

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