LONELIEST ROOM IN TOWN
For the few women working in MLB press boxes, the Jared Porter story is not unthinkable, it’s familiar
For women working in baseball, there is always a moment when we question: What exactly is this guy’s motive?
It can be as simple and harmless of a comment as, “Terrific job so far, you’re handling the new gig really well.” Or,
“Hit me up later and we’ll talk about your question then.” Or even, “Let me know if you need anything.”
Every interaction, no matter how casual, raises an unspoken question. What are his intentions? Is he just being nice? Is he expressing romantic interest in me? If he is interested in me, just how badly can this go?
A large part of this job is a guessing game, particularly for women on a baseball beat, within an industry that is dependent on private texts and messages to gain information and, down the line, have a successful career. Working in a male-dominated industry has many layers, many of which are degrading, and it’s immediately obvious how singularly unique some of these experiences are. As the only woman on the Mets beat, I have no other person regularly around to understand the complex heartaches involved in being checked out or harassed when I’m just trying to do my job.
In my fifth year working in baseball, I’ve lost count of how many sexist comments have been made directly to me while working. Many unacceptable situations that I would, at first, confront head-on as a fresh college graduate have begun to blend together and remain suppressed in fear of repercussions that could adversely affect my career. It can be a lonely place.
It’s not simply the Mets beat, of course. This is a universal experience for women working in sports media.
According to an ESPN report published late Monday night, Jared Porter repeatedly sent unsolicited texts and photos, including a picture of an erect penis, to a woman reporter in 2016. Porter, 41, was hired by the Mets as general manager this past December. In 2016, he was the director of professional scouting for the Cubs. The Mets fired Porter on Tuesday after learning about the detailed ESPN report.
The woman, a foreign correspondent who chose to remain anonymous, did not know how to respond to Porter’s unwanted advances. She felt panicky and hid from Porter while they both worked at Wrigley Field, then turned down opportunities at locations that would involve Porter.
This outcome, the unequivocal diminishment of the reporter’s career and opportunities, happened out of sight of Porter, and of the well-intentioned men now condemning him. Porter crossed the line; the woman had to make space. This problem will not be solved by firing Jared Porter and the other Jared Porters of the world who believe they are entitled to women’s attention. The problem is that the Jared Porters are operating in a society that tells men that whatever they dream of is theirs for the taking — including less powerful women.
Porter knew the woman was communicating with him because he was a professional source. At one point, he told her the Cubs made a trade. He also sent her photos of his bulge, and of a penis, surely knowing that she would be professionally obliged to look at anything he sent her. In other words, he forced her to guess.
Eventually, Porter’s actions, which included 62 unanswered texts in a 23-day span, according to the ESPN report, led the woman to develop serious sleep problems and spells of anxiety. She soon moved back to her home country and switched careers from journalism to finance, in part because of Porter’s inappropriate sexual advances.
For many, Porter’s outrageous behavior may seem unthinkable, being so far removed from their everyday experience. For women who work in professional environments like baseball, without the luxury of
never having to think about these situations in their own lives, Porter’s methodology was familiar, if extreme. For me, it hit home.
In 2017, I worked for Major League Baseball as a multimedia reporter based out of Chelsea Market. A few months into the gig, a new employee was hired and he approached me. We grabbed lunch one day at a nearby sushi restaurant and I considered him a colleague and an acquaintance. But he didn’t understand that I had drawn a line and it soon became clear that he wasn’t afraid to cross it. He quickly indicated he wanted more when he began sending me inappropriate messages on Slack while working. He called me beautiful. He asked questions like why I wasn’t into him or why I wasn’t showing love. He said he told his mom about me.
The messages made me uncomfortable and I asked him to stop. Instead, he aggressively sent more texts and Slack messages, and even left a letter on my desk. He started following me around the office and I started hiding from him in the bathroom. What made him think this was an appropriate way to treat anyone, let alone a colleague?
Scared and frustrated, I blocked his number and went to my boss. She put us on different shifts so I wouldn’t see him and set up a meeting with HR. Meanwhile, he found different avenues to contact me, like Facebook messenger and fake accounts. He messaged my friend, another MLB employee he knew through work, on Facebook to try to get in touch with me.
Since he was employed as a part-time worker, HR said they “let him go” on the basis that it was soon the postseason and as many employees were not needed. Even though he no longer worked at MLB, he wasn’t done contacting me through various mediums. In the letter he left on my desk, he said he knew where I lived and planned on sending me flowers. Once again, I was forced to guess. He said he knew where I lived: Was that a threat? I became fearful that he was waiting for me outside my Brooklyn apartment with more domineering attempts to try to get me to take an interest in him. I went to the police and filed a harassment complaint.
Mostly, I felt scared and powerless. What else could I do besides wait it out and hope he stopped contacting me? Eventually, he apologized for sending incessant messages and said he would go away now. To be honest, I didn’t believe him. The messages stopped and I haven’t heard from him since 2018.
That same year, a beloved broadcaster in the industry approached me in the media dining room at a ballpark and made inappropriate comments about being “a short and cute brunette.” This was a person I respected, but his comments repulsed me. I told some colleagues about the incident and it was mostly laughed off. “That’s just how he is,” was the most common response. When that person started looking for me in the pressbox, I once again found myself hiding in the bathroom. The man crossed the line, and the woman made space for him.
It’s hard to know how many other women go through harassments like these because it’s difficult to stomach talking about them. Even now, I struggle with publishing my experiences because I don’t want these men to have the pleasure of smearing my career, or to have the option to do so. For any real change to occur, being oblivious cannot be an excuse. People like Porter get away with disgusting behavior, and people like the woman he harassed suffer silently out of sight, because men in the industry do not have to worry about the same things as women.
They they still have the capacity to be surprised by a Jared Porter.
Though I have friends I can lean on who help me concentrate and focus on my job, this foreign correspondent felt alone in an unfamiliar country. And yet, despite the feeling of being deserted, the woman who was the victim of Porter’s incessant and disgusting texts is strong. It would have been easier for her, especially because she lives in a different country and has moved on from journalism, to close the door on her experience and keep the incident locked away. But she came forward in an effort to prevent her situation from happening to someone else.
She did her part. Now it’s baseball’s turn.