The Teacher Who Saved Our Village
Lifting spirits after a death
TEACHERS in New York are often the focus of criticism. But here in Croton on Hudson, where 6yearold Lacey Carr was mysteriously found dead in her home beside her unconscious mother, our firstgrade teacher is a hero to us all.
It seemed like the whole village turned out for Lacey’s funeral Friday— it was standing-room-only inside the Holy Name of Mary Church. I didn’t recognize the tall, auburnhaired woman about to give the eulogy, who peered at us with swollen, red eyes. She spoke softly.
“This is the highest honor of my life to speak today at the request of Lacey’s loving family on behalf of her 21 little classmates. Many people know that I am Lacey’s firstgrade teacher, Mrs. Patricia Lynch, or ‘ hey, Miss Lynch,’ as the kids around town say.” That’s when I lost it. The reason I didn’t recognize my own son’s former firstgrade teacher is that I had never seen her sad. Mrs. Lynch was the one who’d “pantsed” a Harlem Globetrotter at a school fundraiser. She was the one who once threw a math text out the window to show that numbers are always around us. The woman is a nonstop teachable moment for going at life with all the joy you can muster.
So here we all were, straining to hear our community’s famous firstgrade teacher as she whispered words of comfort.
Itwas going to be a tricky eulogy to deliver. Outside, news cameras were ready to pounce. Reporters wanted to know: “Do you think it was a botched murdersuicide?” Inside, the community unconditionally supported their own, including Lacey’s mother.
And a firstgrade teacher — not the mayor, town lawyer or school communications director — was tasked to do the job.
“I know that Lacey was loved deeply by her entire family and that your grief is as vast as the celestial sky. I know she was loved at home by the way she loved. Lacey was on the same basketball cheer team asmy d daughter. And, yes, she did dance like no one was watching . . . with pure and utter joy.”
There was no question where Mrs. Lynch stood on the issue of Lacey’s mother, Kathleen Dymes. “Kathy came into our classroom to decorate gingerbread houses with us and recently attended our family math night,” Mrs. Lynch told us. “She stayed after to talk about strategies she could use to help Lacey in math. Kathy’s face just lit up and she was giddy during our November parentteacher conference as I told her how strong Lacey was academically and how welladjusted she was.”
And then, speaking directly to Kathy, she said, “You loved Lacy with every ounce of your being.”
Up on the lectern, Mrs. Lynch was regaining her strength, and so were we.
“Two days ago, I brought in my wedding album to show the class. It was my 21st wedding anniversary. I wanted the class to get their mind off of things and laugh, which they did — at my big hair and the extra pounds that have snuck up on me.
“I know that [ it] would have been big news for Lacey to come home and say what Mrs. Lynch looked like on her wedding day. I just know she would have politely reassured me that I looked like a princess and that my hair was very fancy, and then she would beg me to wear my wedding dress to school one day. . . And I’d have to tell her that it doesn’t fit so well anymore and is really out of style.
“She just was as sweet as they come.” We laughed, and felt better. The crowd walked up the hill to the old cemetery, where Mrs. Lynch, ever the resourceful teacher, broke off blooms from her daisy bouquet for us to put on the pink and white casket. She told us how the parents all had to tell their kids about Lacey at home, and how some of the girls got mad at them for delivering such awful news.
And how the class had to take a vote about what to do when it was Lacey’s turn to sit in the class’ “comfy” chair.”
“‘ But we made a good team, Mrs. Lynch, and it’s just not fair that Lacey isn’t here.’ There’s going to be many ‘ Lacey would do this, and Lacey would say that’ moments in the days that come for all of us.”
And then Mrs. Lynch had to rush back to school: A family was bringing in baby chicks for a unit on springtime rebirth and renewal.