Gimme a break!

YOU think dating in NYCis tough? Try breaking up in the city. As summer flings fizzle out for the fall, five New Yorkers share their most unconventional breakup stories:

Status: not in a

relationship

“I’d been dating a guy for three months, and we had a bit of a blowout one night. Instead of staying over, I told him I thought it would be better if I went home so we could both cool off solo. When I got back to my apartment, I logged into Facebook, and saw he had posted a new status update: “New girlfriend turned out to be a psycho bitch. Guess I’m single again. Anyone know anyone?” I unfriended him and never heard from him again!”

— Kathryn, 32, Jersey City, NJ

Parental approval required

“I’d been dating a woman for about six months when she brought me home to meet her family. At one point during the weekend, I mentioned how excited I was to go to their family reunion that summer. That evening, her mom asked me to help in the kitchen. When I did, she told me that the family reunion was only for people who would be connected to the family for the long run — and that she knew from talking with her daughter that I wouldn’t make the cut. So, yes, I got dumped

by my girlfriend’s mom.”

— Dave, 36, Jackson Heights, Queens

Criminal offense

“I had been dating a guy for about six weeks. He lived in New Jersey, so we only saw each other once or twice a week, but we texted regularly. One week, I hadn’t heard from him in a few days, so, on a whim, I Googled his name. An article from his hometown paper about local arrests came up — he’d been caught stealing from an electronics store! And then, to make matters worse, a week later, I got a letter from him from prison saying it was best if we called off our ‘relationship.’ ”

— Kathryn, 28, Cobble Hill, Brooklyn

A little late for long distance

“I met a woman who said she’d just moved to New York from London. We dated the entire summer, but then in September she said she was heading back to London to see family but that she’d be back in about a week. Aweek passed, and I asked her when she was coming back. She was vague about it. So I messaged one of her friends who commented frequently on her Facebook feed — turns out, she never ‘lived’ in New York, she knew she was only here for a summer and had planned to go back the whole time.”

— Steve, 23, Murray Hill

Don’t cry for me

“I got a text from my girlfriend of nearly a year: ‘Going to have “the talk” with Reid tonight. Do you think he’ll cry? And what do I do if he does?’ Yes, she had meant to send it to a friend. And, no, I did not cry.”

— Reid, 32, Prospect Heights, Brooklyn