This is the pits
FINDING a ripe avocado in NYC that doesn’t require you to dip into your 401k is hard, but it’s no longer enough.
The burgeoning trend among health-loving Instagrammers is slicing an avocado half into dozens of postcard-thin “petals” and then carefully forming said petals into a rose worthy of a high school prom corsage.
The rose is then placed on a piece of sprouted toast and topped with Maldon salt. Once placed, it should be photographed and Instagrammed immediately.
Naturally, I had to try this for myself. On Saturday, I braved the Brooklyn Whole Foods, pushed aside several athleisure-clad dads, and found a ready-for-prime-time avocado among a mound of rock-hard specimens.
I successfully peeled half of the avocado and sliced it thinly. “I got this,” I thought to myself. But when I tried to curl the avocado petals into shape, they didn’t quite bend. The avocado was too firm for this nonsense, and I ended up with a rounded square. Still, it looked good enough to eat, and as I slid it onto my knife to transfer it to a plate, it fell to the floor, where a mouse had been scampering only hours earlier. I decided then that it was best to leave the roses to perky Los Angeles people with ample supplies of avocados. In New York, all I can do is angrily mash mine onto a piece of toast before I see that mouse again.