Mommies meanest

Petty parenting Facebook groups are now more exclusive than the hottest clubs

TERE Fox scrolled through her Facebook feed, then clicked over to the “groups” tab at the side of her screen. Nothing. She had been unceremoniously kicked out of a local Facebook parent group.

“It hurt like hell when I realized that,” says Fox, 38, a Jersey City, NJ, resident and co-founder of Rockin’ Raw, a vegan restaurant in the West Village.

One day in March, Fox posted her opinions on cow’s milk in the group forum.

“A mom had a question about what type of milk to give her child,” says Fox. “I believe that plantbased milks are far more nutritious, so I shared that, along with a poster comparing the ingredients of both.” Apparently, Fox says, the administrator took issue with her opinions and booted her from the group.

Parenting in New York City has always been cutthroat — but now the cattiness has gone online, with digital parenting groups becoming more and more exclusive. People are kicked out swiftly for posting vaguely controversial opinions or giving unpopular advice, or because they don’t live in the right ZIP code. And online drama easily extends into the real world.

Jamie, 30, an Upper West Side mom who declined to give her last name for privacy reasons, found herself rearranging her schedule when she realized a mom who bullied her for using formula in a local parenting group also attended the same music class where she regularly took her young daughter.

In real life, the online bully didn’t seem to recognize her.

“She acted like nothing was wrong, and even asked if we were going to be [at the class] next week. She clearly had no idea who I was, even though she had made my life miserable,” says Jamie, who ended up switching to a different music class to avoid the woman.

Krista Rizzo, founder of the Park Slope parent-coach company Why Am I Yelling and a member of several local parenting Facebook groups, says the online sniping is often based on insecurity.

“I’ve been a parent for 11 years, and competition is the one constant. Everything is heightened here, and we all want the best for our children,” says Rizzo, 44. “Everyone has an opinion, and everyone thinks [she has] the best opinion.”

Jealousy also comes into play. “People make up stories about the people whose avatars they see. I remind people, she might have a townhouse, but she also may not see her husband 90 hours a week,” says Rizzo. “Everyone has stuff.”

But despite the drama, parents say it’s just part of the package. “As new parents, we’re sleep-deprived, overworked and exhausted. I get it,” says Fox. “But it still hurts.”

Insecure moms are kicking fellow parents out of socialmedia groups because of silly disputes.