Over-‘groan’ kids at The Post take on Punderdome

The King’s English

If you’re reading this untranslated, you already have a leg up. English is the language most conducive to punning. It has more than a million words, the largest vocabulary in history. English has also absorbed elements from hundreds of other languages, allowing for puns like “Paris is a site for soirees.” Also, unlike less fluid languages such as Latin or Greek, English nouns can become verbs, like that blind car-

penter who picked up his hammer and saw. Shortened? Sweet!

The key to making puns out of longer words is breaking them down by syllable and finding smaller words or phrases to sub in. (Indestructible, for instance, contains “in this truck, the bull.”) Sticking to smaller words makes it easier to see through the verbal fog and find simple substitutions. But walking straight through the fog is a mist opportunity.

Express Yourself

Familiar expressions are ripe for punning, since there’s always a second context to work in for one or two of the words within them. Bring on the slogans, the song lyrics and movie quotes. Just don’t use stuff in that second context too forcefully, or it’ll turn into a sweaty mess — like when Mitt Romney suggested a line cook serve eggs benedict in hubcaps because “there’s no plates like chrome for the hollandaise.”

Youthful in Digressions

Kids absolutely love puns. When they find out that what’s black and white and read all over is a newspaper, it hits their brains like a magic trick. That’s why some neuroscientists suggest pun appreciation in adults is a sign of immaturity. Embrace it. When coming up with puns, listen to your inner child. Just because you’re a little older doesn’t mean you can’t stay young at art.