Heard mentality
With sex scandals raging from Hollywood to Washington, this must be some kind of banner season for celebrity gossip mags. Add to that Prince Harry finally picking a bride, and we couldn’t resist grabbing a couple of glossy rags to get our fix. So did they deliver the dirt we were craving?
US Weekly’s cover page promises to tell “all the details” of Meghan Markle’s upcoming holiday with fiancé Prince Harry and the royal family. But if you were hoping to hear how Markle’s Los Angeles breeding and manners went over with the house of Windsor, you’ll be sorely disappointed.
Indeed, US appears to have been locked out of this outing to Scotland’s Balmoral Castle, leaving it to pad its four-page spread with verbiage we could find in travel brochures. It would have been fun to read about royal gift-giving traditions, had we not heard the stories before. US’s cheeky tidbit — provided by a former Kensington Pal- ace chef — about Princess Anne gifting Prince Charles a Britannia toilet seat has been rehashed in the press for years.
We did enjoy reading that Markle will be sitting out on the family’s annual Boxing Day pheasant hunt and will likely be staying in house with a pregnant Princess Kate. That said, we’re not hopeful that we’ll be reading next week about, say, Megan holding Kate’s hair while she suffers her latest bout of morning sickness.
InTouch, meanwhile, commendably chose to focus on the Matt Lauer scandal, branding the disgraced “Today” show host the “Husband From Hell” on its cover.
The four-page spread documents Lauer’s years of alleged creepiness — including the oft-reported “bag of sex toys” in his office, a “scorned lover” writing “You f--ked me!” on the mirror in his dressing room, and his wife calling out his “cruel and inhumane treatment” of her in divorce papers that she filed and later withdrew years ago.
The horndog anchor may have also fathered children with two former co-workers, InTouch dishes. A rep told the mag the claim was “completely and provably false.”
We also had more fun with InTouch’s treatment of the coming royal wedding.
Markle isn’t like most brides, of course. Her to-do list goes far beyond terrorizing a legion of bridesmaids. In addition to telling us that Markle will have to join the Church of England, InTouch also shares that she will have to learn how to sit properly: “knees and ankles locked together.”
The soon-to-be royal will also have to learn how to curtsy to senior royals — including her soonto-be nephew Prince George, who is 4 years old, and niece Princess Charlotte, 2.