Announcers bring the noise

I’VE TRIED, so help me, but this is the mandate: Game telecasts will be slathered — drowned — in verbal excess no matter how foolish, annoying and senseless.

Why? If I knew you’d be the second to know. Spin the dial:

CBS’s Rich Gannon during Sunday’s Jets-Pats said, “[ Bill] Belichick doesn’t tolerate quarterbacks who don’t take care of the football.” Strong stuff. What coach does? But who, other than Tom Brady, has Belichick had to tolerate the last 19 seasons?

CBS’s SEC analyst Gary Danielson was cherished for speaking plain football. Then he began to parrot modern nonsense, thus players who were once “open” are, as he said three times in consecutive sentences during Saturday’s Notre Dame-Georgia, “out in space.”

NBC’s Sunday night NFL analyst Cris Collinsworth was valued as a concise observer. He didn’t deliver speeches or player assessments after every play. He does now, relegating himself to background noise. Why would he copy Moose Johnston?

Fox’s Ronde Barber is another thrown into the analyst mix apparently with instructions to say far more than needs to be heard. He finally ended Sunday’s Giants-Bucs filibuster with, “And so the Tampa Bay kicking-game woes continue, again.”

And Fox’s reprised “novel” idea of teaming Tiki Barber with Ronde and Kenny Albert was a repeat of last season’s feckless gimmick, more intrusion than inclusion. Don’t know if it attracted additional viewers, but it annoyed existing ones.

Then again, when Fox promotes Michael Vick as a panelist on one of its FS1 NFL shows, does it think the intelligent are moved to tune in or to shake their heads in pathetic wonder?