Weird BUT true

He was sitting on a gold mine.

A man was busted smuggling nearly 2 pounds of gold paste in his rectum at an airport in India — one of at least three cases of people stuffing the precious metal up their rumps in the region in the past year.

Mohammad Sharif was at the Imphal Airport in Manipur headed to New Delhi on Monday when an officer noticed “suspicious movements,” took him to a medical-exam room for an X-ray and allegedly found the treasure, valued at $56,000, authorities said.

Even the tide was high.

Extreme levels of cocaine and MDMA were found in a waterway near the site of a music festival in England, threatening a rare species of eel, according to scientists.

Party drugs found in the river — likely caused by revelers peeing outside — more than quadrupled the week after the Glastonbury festival, the researchers said.

He got more than he bargained for.

A customer shopping for a car at a dealership in Florida was gobsmacked when he found a naked woman pleasuring herself in the back seat of a Jeep Wrangler, cops said.

Alexis King, 37, allegedly also damaged the interior of the for-sale ride, which was parked outside Bob Tyler Toyota in Pensacola, according to police, who arrested her.

It was a stroke of luck.

A Colorado man found a piece of art he painted more than 20 years ago at a Goodwill near his home after he sold it to a stranger at age 14.

Jacob Hansen, of Denver, spotted the painting of wilting sunflowers, bought it back for $20 and now wants to sell it again for charity.

They want to crack the case.

Cops are hunting for two thieves who allegedly swiped a bronze statue of the nurseryrhyme egg Humpty Dumpty sitting on a toilet from an art fair in Madison, Wis.

The sculpture — titled “Dumpty Humpty” and valued at $1,400 — went missing from a vendor’s stand after she stepped away briefly.