Burn baby burn ... a timeout
YEARS ago a football announcer, and I forgot who it was, noticed that a team had just been forced to call a timeout because of confusion. Thus, he said, the head coach was forced to “burn a timeout.” Good description, as the timeout was wasteful.
But for no known sensible reason, virtually all timeouts taken are now referred to as “burns.” You don’t “use” or “call” a timeout, you only burn them.
Saturday, just before the half against Penn State, Rutgers coach Greg Schiano called a strategic timeout. BTN’s Cory Provus said he “burned a timeout.”
The next day, with the Dolphins driving against the Jets, 13 seconds left in the half, Miami called a timeout as a matter of common sense. Still, CBS’s Adam Archuleta said Miami had “to burn a timeout” — as if Miami might otherwise have saved it. ➤ Imagine having been laid off by Fox as a cost-cutting measure then watching halftime of Fox’s college football telecasts to see no fewer than five guys shipped to the site of the game to each speak a sentence of no importance.
Oregon-Utah, Saturday on ABC, identified Utah as the team in its traditional red. But neither team wore even a stitch of red.
Every time ESPN presented a crowd shot from Giants-Buccaneers on Monday, it was of a “fan” who appeared to have escaped a facility for the criminally insane. The repetitive message: Attending NFL games is both expensive and risky.
Apparently, advertisers think of Serena Williams as so beloved by the American public she can successfully endorse everything and anything. Yet, I don’t find that to be the case, quite the contrary.
Reader Todd Ailts suggests that the fan who vomited on the court during Jazz-Kings on Saturday was just doing his part to curtail courtstorming. The incident also created the unique: Both teams hustled back on defense at the same time.
➤ More Genuine Pigskin Gibberish: Fox’s Greg Olsen, Sunday, after Packers RB AJ Dillon caught a pass: “He is a phenomenal catcher of the football.” Then
Olsen must be a phenomenal thrower of the baloney.
ESPN’s Booger McFarland at halftime of Monday’s Giants-Bucs: “There is not a team in the NFL more left tackle-dependent than the Dallas Cowboys.”
Given that Dallas QB Dak Prescott is more mobile than most, I wish McFarland explained why Dallas’ left tackle is more essential than, say, the LT of any “pocket-dependent” QB.
And while it’s probably none of my business, but if someone’s tackled in the open field — now also known as “in space” — how open is the field? Only Michael Strahan will be eligible to be tackled in space.