A schmear focus

I tried modeling. I had 57 beauty titles. How legit? One p.r. guy named me Miss New Jersey — and I’d never been to New Jersey. Talk about big time, the Brooklyn Better Bagel Association crowned me Miss Bagel. A crown of shellacked bagels on my head. Mindy Levine actually found that photo, which was probably still stuck in someone’s cream cheese. My first interview? The Duchess of Windsor. In her Waldorf suite. Across their couch lay a huge tiger skin. “His Highness,” she said (that was the Duke) “shot it, is partial to it and it comes along whenever we travel.”