Starring in the city scenery
NEWS from the front:
Bill de Blasio. He has yet another new hair color. With nothing else to do he hit Midtown’s Hilton ballroom sporting a fresh cut with just a tinge of strawberry tint. Just in time for summer.
Robert De Niro. At Mr. Chow in Tribeca with pal Martin Short. De Niro chomped chicken and rice plus a giant toothpick.
Jeff Zucker. Took longtime lady friend — former co-worker Allison Gollust — to Lincoln Center Theater for the premiere of the play “Corruption.” Lots of clapping then they left arm-inarm.
A few class acts
STUDY hall crimes? The city launched a school safety tip line where students or staff or parents or teachers can dial in safety tips — like to report knives, guns, all that stuff. But our city Department of Education geniuses forgot to give the public the number, so I’ll pass it along: 917-800-TIPS (8477). It rings you to a School Safety Officer or takes a message. Apparently, I have to do everything.
Lost, and found
BILL Murray at the Love Rocks NYC concert at Beacon Theater last week. But he was a little bamboozled. He’d left his phone in the Uber so obviously couldn’t call the driver. His choice? Locate some percussionist and bang the dude’s drums or just squat on the curb and cry. Private investigator Herman Weisberg of Sage Intelligence used street smarts. Walked outside, found the driver (how he located which and who, I don’t know) but he recovered it. He returned it. Grateful thankful inexpensive Murray then snapped a selfie with him.
“Argylle” — the extra ‘L’ is for loco. In it Bryce Dallas Howard, Samuel L. Jackson, Bryan Cranston, Sam Rockwell, Dua Lipa and that zero John Cena who paraded his shriveled talent behind a towel to pretend he’s naked at the Oscars. Some of us probably saw better in high school.
As a little boy John Travolta’s big sisters dressed him as a girl and nicknamed him “Brenda Starr Eyes.”
Names & shames
MORE nicknames. Julianna Margulies: “Always teased for my fat head and big lips. My face was even rounder as a child. I’d be called ‘Flounder Mouth’ because my lips were large. I’d cry about it.” ... Gisele Bündchen — gawky, unattractive in school. “Kids called me ‘Olive’ after Popeye’s wife. And thin legs like matchsticks. Everyone laughed. I was never allowed in the circle of girls who tarted up for the guys.” ... Sophia Loren got nicknamed “Stechetto,” which means the stick ... Mariah Carey was “Mirage” because she never showed up for school . . . Streisand’s when she made the film “Mirror Has Two Faces” was “The Mirror Has Two Chins” . . . And Russell Crowe — not in school but now out of school — when he gained so much weight: “The Gladi-eater.”
ME. I’m bitching. I’m entitled. With Washington pols, like sharks, taking bites out of us, taxes are rising faster than prices. I want to be an asylum-seeking migrant in my next life.
But only in New York, kids, only in New York.