THE WOODS, BAD & UGLY

Too much TV coverage, false reverence for Tiger

THESE days, you can never be too careful. For instance, if a squad of bodysnatchers planned to infiltrate Augusta National to abscond with Tiger Woods, it wouldn’t have been on CBS/ ESPN’s watch.

Despite Woods’ highly predictable diminishing returns, TV cameras again haven’t let him out of our sight during the first two rounds — not from the minute he leaves the clubhouse for the first tee until he returns, no matter how many hours later.

The only time TV chooses to dismiss its all-hands-on-deck Tiger Patrol is when he leaves the premises due to an injury or missing the cut.

The younger adult men and women in our lives may find this impossible to believe, but, oh, 25 years ago, the Masters appeared much differently on TV. There wasn’t any finagling of the leaderboard to show Woods first among eight players tied at 2-over, no video examinations and speculations of how he was walking after every shot, no over-the-top and highly disingenuous testimonies to Woods as the greatest human being to graced our eyes.

Got it? Most viewers know that’s not true — not by a long shot — but why would any TV golf folks suddenly be driven to tell the truth?

Before the hideous excesses of TV Woods became the only reason to watch golf’s majors, the Masters on CBS was a limitedby-club rules telecast, but one that followed all the contenders — be they Jack Nicklaus or Nick Price. Lasting rooting interests developed.

Now? If you don’t buy into TV’s Woods myopia, you can check your cell phones to see how the other guys are doing. Or perhaps to see if Woods’ “special” Canadian doctor has had his license restored.

Thursday, as TV marveled at Woods’ “soft hands” on pitch shots — a pro golf norm and need since Gene Sarazen was kicking slats out his cradle — a TV camera then cut to a closeup of Wood’ hands.

“This,” surmises reader Peter Covino, “was to prove that Woods indeed has hands.”

Friday, when Woods was eight back, more of the same.

Back in the days when TV allowed us to watch it, The Masters was great.