Bad news comes secondhand about bride’s wedding plans

Dear Abby: I am getting married soon. I grew up without a biological father. “Tom” has been like a father to me for almost two decades. I have gone on several family vacations with him and his family.

I asked Tom if he would walk me down the aisle. He agreed but, he has commented to others that he thinks it is inappropriate since he is not my father and does not consider me family.

I am devastated and unsure how to react. Tom knows I know but has made no attempt to contact me to talk. Should I reach out to him and ask why? Should I wait for his call? Should I let it go and move on? I feel like this pain has dampened the excitement of my upcoming wedding. Do you have

any advice on how to move forward? — Fatherless In The East

Dear Fatherless: Staying silent will accomplish nothing. Call Tom and tell him what you were told and ask if it is true because it may not be. Something may have been lost in translation.

If it is true, however, remember: You are an independent young woman who can walk herself to the altar. Many women do that these days because they consider the act of being “given” in marriage to be outdated. You could also ask a close male or female friend or your mom to accompany you.

Whether what you were told is true or not, thank Tom for the important role he has played in your life. Do not allow anything to cast a pall on your wedding day!

Dear Abby: I’m a single woman with nothing to do on Saturday nights. I work full time and keep busy during most of the year with various hobbies. I do not have a boyfriend (not for lack of trying), or nephews or nieces. My apartment is too small for a pet.

None of my friends are available on Saturday evenings, so I am feeling a bit lonely. I have asked my family for suggestions, but they don’t have any. Would you have any ideas for someone in my situation? — Sulking In Saskatoon, Canada

Dear Sulking: Saskatoon is not the middle of nowhere. If there is a movie you would like to see, go. And surely there is a public library. Check out some good books and read them — it will give you something to talk about. Look into taking a dance class or exercise class. If you do, you may make new friends. Make a point of staying informed about what is happening in your city week by week, because there must be plenty going on if only because of its size.