Wife stunned to discover her husband’s weighty fetish

Dear Abby: My husband and I married two years ago. A year later we welcomed our first child. I never imagined I would ever want a divorce but, I found out this year that my husband has a fetish for bigger women. (He actually said it.) He is a “feeder” and has purchased books, watched videos and read stories about it while sitting next me on the couch! It turns him on. He asked me to consider gaining weight. I told him he needs help.

I made an appointment for him to see a therapist, and am forcing him to go. I feel cheated on and disrespected. I don’t know how to handle this. I don’t know how to be with someone who has such a strong impulse. I hate to feel at fault for breaking up our family, but I can’t go along with this and risk my health. I also don’t know how to live apart from him. Any help is appreciated. — Wife

Of A Feeder

Dear Wife: Your husband should have discussed this with you before you married. Gaining weight to feed your husband’s fetish would not be healthy for you physically or emotionally.

Because you already have a licensed mental health professional in your database, schedule an appointment for yourself to help you decide what you need to do. (Can your husband be content to have his fantasy but not involve you?) You may not want to “feel at fault” for walking away, but you aren’t going to change him, and your first responsibility must be to maintain your health so you can parent your child to adulthood.

Dear Abby: This has been weighing on me for a long time. A guy I’ve known for years receives tons of food from a food pantry his sister runs. It sickens me because he’s financially set. He brags about never having to buy groceries. I think about the children and families who are in need of food during these terrible times. He is the worst kind of cheapskate and doesn’t like spending money.

Obviously, if his sister is allowing this, she is doing the same thing. I told him he should be ashamed of himself for taking advantage of this program. His response was that he served our country, so he’s entitled! He truly feels the food is owed to him. This has been bothering me for a long time and, to be honest, I wish he had never told me. — Disgusted In Connecticut

Dear Disgusted: And your question is? Those two appear to have no conscience. Contact the head of the organization that sponsors the food bank and tell the person what you have written to me. I don’t think I’m being too harsh to point out that “Sissy” is guilty too. Shameless.