Northwest Arkansas Democrat-Gazette
New relationship founders on sharing of offensive video
Dear Abby: A casual friend sent me a video of a comic being vulgar. I was offended by it and forwarded it to my girlfriend to find out what she thought about it. She got very upset and told me I was being disrespectful to her by passing it on to her. I should add that we met online and have been talking on the phone with each other for only a month during this shelter-in-place time.
This incident nearly ended our new relationship. Was I wrong to send her the video? And what should I do now to save what I think is the most wonderful relationship I have ever had in my life? — No
Laughing Matter Dear No Laughing:
Before sending the video, you should have warned your new girlfriend about the content and asked if she wanted to see it — giving her the opportunity to refuse. What you should do now is apologize and tell her how much you value your relationship with her.
Dear Abby: My wife had some health issues over the last four years and gained 40 pounds. She keeps saying she wants to lose the weight, but doesn’t do anything. Her blood pressure is high, so she needs to do it. When I try to bring it up, she gets mad and always mentions the health issues. But those are totally behind her. What can I do or say? — Full Of Concern In New Jersey
Dear Full: Tell your wife you don’t mean to come across as a nag, but you are worried because of her blood pressure. She is far from the only person who procrastinates when faced with changing one’s lifestyle.
Many folks are overindulging now because of the challenge of social isolation. Encourage her to get out and start walking with you on a regular basis. And drop the subject of weight for now. Take it up again once your lives begin to normalize and she may be less defensive.
Dear Abby: My collegeage daughter, “Dahlia,” refuses to take social distancing seriously. She says it’s all overblown, even though her father and I are older and she has a pregnant sister at home.
Dahlia thinks she’s invincible. I think my daughter is
selfish. What can I say to her? — Following The Rules In West Virginia
Dear Following: Many people still are having trouble accepting that we are all at risk because of a silent “enemy,” covid-19. Because you are unable to get through to Dahlia, establish some rules to protect yourself, your husband, your pregnant daughter and your unborn grandchild. First among them: Dahlia must follow the government guidelines regarding social distancing, handwashing, etc. or find another place to live.