How to give allowances

While I’m on a short break, I hope you’ll enjoy this “Best Of ” column, which tackles parenting.

Dear Readers:

I grew up poor without the extras, such as an allowance. My husband and I have a comfortable life now, and I would like to give my children an allowance for the things they need or want.

What are some guidelines for allowances, such as dollar amounts for the ages and how often should an allowance be given?

Dear Amy:

I like the method some parents use of setting up three piggy banks — one for spending, one for saving and one for donating. If you start the child at around age 5, you could give $3 each week, encouraging the child to place $1 in each bank. You can help guide your children by encouraging them as they watch their savings grow, and donating some of their own money to a worthy cause. (March 2005)

Dear Mom:

I am the father of a 19-year-old daughter. She is a great kid, smart, stays out of trouble and has lots of friends. The problem is that she likes to run around the house in her underwear.

I will come home from work and she will be sitting in front of the TV with just a T-shirt and underwear on or come out of the shower with only a

Dear Amy:

towel on her head. She doesn’t do this when we have houseguests. I have asked her to put more clothes on, but she just tells me not to be so stuffy. My wife thinks this is just a passing phase.

What do you think?

Your daughter’s reaction to you tells me that she doesn’t worry too much about respecting your point of view; I don’t know how that strikes you, but that would probably bother me more than the nudity. If she continues to refuse to respect this pretty simple request, the next time she spends an evening at home, you might want to come to dinner wearing only your boxer shorts. If she asks you what’s going on, you can look at your daughter and say, “Stop being so stuffy! Please pass the potatoes.” (July 2004)

Dear Father: