Streep needs to sharpen sports act
Because she was too busy playing Madden 17 to do it herself, allow me to apologize to the sports world on behalf of Meryl Streep.
You may have heard she went on a bit of a rant after accepting the Cecil B. DeMille Award at the Golden Globe Awards. Screen Actors Guild rules stipulated she had to rail against Donald Trump, so I don’t have an issue with that.
But why did she have to drag the NFL and mixed martial arts into her speech?
Actually, we know why. Screen Actors Guild rules also require Hollywood stars to be self-absorbed condescending dipwads. That’s why Streep gazed out into a room full of movie stars and said they all “belong to the most vilified segments in American society right now.”
As Jay Cutler would say, “Huh?”
The most vilified segments of American society are referees, Cleveland Browns quarterbacks, NASCAR fans, Cutler and snotty Duke basketball players.
I’m guessing that Streep isn’t familiar with Christian Laettner, J.J. Redick, Steve Wojciechowski,
Greg Paulus or Grayson Allen. While she was probably at Spago on Tuesday night enjoying some Yukon Gold Potato Puree, Allen was in Tallahassee having 11,000 frothing FSU fans call him a #%&@!!!
Streep also whined that if Trump’s master plan to rid Hollywood and America of all foreigners is successful, “You’ll have nothing to watch but football and mixed martial arts, which are not the arts.”
Forget that pro football and MMA have more diversity and foreign talent than 100 Academy Awards shows, who appointed Streep the Supreme Court Justice of Art?
Philosophers have spent centuries trying to define “art.” All I know is, the COMMENTARY National Endowment for the Arts once spent $15,000 on a photo of a crucifix in a jar of urine. If that’s art, so is the exploration of bravery, sportsmanship, discipline and violence encompassed in the human conflict of sport.
Or maybe I’m just a gap-toothed fan clinging to my UFC and
Streep didn’t realize the irony when she pontificated, “An actor’s only job is to enter the lives of people who are different from us and let you feel what that feels like.”
Perhaps in her next movie, the grand dame of Hollywood should play an MMA fan or a punky Duke basketball player. She might learn something about the fine art of humility.
Johnny Paycheck
Arizona Sen. Jeff Flake released his annual government wastebook last week, highlighting 50 federal programs that specialize in throwing your money away. Among them was a $1.5 million grant to the National Science Foundation to test what happens when fish use treadmills and $1.7 million to the National Comedy Center for holograms of dead comedians. In related news, Johnny
Manziel will have two autograph signings during Super Bowl Week. For $99, he’ll pose for a professional photo. Selfies with Johnny Ex-Football will cost you $50.
When informed of the signings, Congress quickly approved $30 million to study why anyone would spend $50 for a selfie with Johnny Manziel. With all due respect to the breakout star of the national championship game was head referee Or more precisely, DeFee’s biceps. They became an Internet sensation, and with good reason. From the neck down, it looked as if a young
had put on the zebra shirt and was making calls on national TV.
The biceps declined to comment on their sudden fame, but DeFee often tells people, “You haven’t lived until you’ve been booed by 100,000 people at one time.”
I’m guessing that’s 99,997 more than have ever booed Meryl Streep’s biceps.
Clarification: The Screen Actors Guild reports that not all of its members are self-absorbed condescending dipwads. Among those who appreciate the artistic beauty of sport —
a taxpayerfunded hologram of
and 86 of the 101 Dalmatians.
Sophie’s Choice — Just Streep’s luck, this year’s Cecil B. DeMille Award came with the choice of season tickets to the L.A. Chargers or dinner with
A Wall Street Journal analysis found Texas fans were the highest booze-percapita drinkers in the nation last season. Now we’ll get to see whether
can drive that many USF fans to drink.
This Just In: The National Endowment for the Arts spent $50,000 on an autographed photo of Johnny Manziel inside a bottle of Miller Lite.