Ask Amy: Frustrated shopper acts out after having a bad day.
Dear Amy: I just got back from shopping at a big box store. This was after a long week of work, so I was already tired.
In the store, people were pushing the too-big carts around, banging their carts off of each other, and all the while talking loudly on their cellphones.
There were long lines at the checkout, and there was a price issue with one of my items.
When I finally went to my car, I found the car next to me had pulled in so close to my car that I hardly had any room to get into my car and unload my groceries.
In frustration, I banged open my door, leaving a nick in the side of their car.
I feel terribly that I did that and wonder if it was a sign of my stress and impatience, or was this a character flaw, and perhaps I’m really not the nice person people think I am? —Wondering
Dear Wondering: Surely you have noticed how sometimes in busy parking lots, one person parking off kilter can throw off the whole line, as people compensate — and perhaps overcompensate — as they pull into a space.
Human nature runs on a similar dynamic. You were having a bad day, so you deliberately gave someone else a bad day. And the person with the damaged car might have gone home and given his kids a bad day.
I think you probably ARE the nice person others think you are. And yes, you are also flawed, just like the rest of us.
Make this right by giving yourself — and everybody within a five-mile radius — a big break. Every person out there has a story, even those playing bumper cars at the big box store. Take a breath. Be gentle. And the next time you are having a great day, spread that around.
Dear Amy: More response to “Non-Hugger.” I am an enthusiastic hugger, and I was in my early 20s — and had literally knocked someone down — before I learned to back off and ask permission before hugging someone.
But I did learn, and I have had people thank me for asking before diving at them with open arms. —Christina
Dear Christina: Well done. You can write Amy Dickinson at askamy@tribune.com or by mail to: Ask Amy, Chicago Tribune, TT500, 435 N. Michigan Ave., Chicago, IL 60611.