Parents should take a different approach to discipline while sheltering in place

destabilized,” Klein said.

Then, remind your kids of rules and expectations. So if your child throws his fort pillow at the cat in a fit of fury, what should you do? First, take a deep breath (or three) so that you don’t lose your temper. “Remind yourself, your child’s not

to drive you crazy,” said Tamar Chansky, Ph.D., a psychologist and author of “Freeing Your Child From Negative Thinking.”

Next, validate their feelings. Say, “Oh, buddy, you’re having such a hard time,” or, “Oh, wow, you seem so angry,” Bryson suggested. With young kids, it can help to get down on their level — to literally sit on the floor with them — as it’s easier to meaningfully connect with them that way. Ask them if they want a snuggle or a cup of water. It might seem strange to respond to misbehavior with support and empathy, but kids right now need “much more compassion than ever before,”

Klein said.

Consider, for instance, how you deal with your kids when they are sick. You’re probably much more patient and tolerant of their whining and outbursts because you know they’re not feeling well. The situation now isn’t that different: When kids act out during a crisis, they are essentially saying, “I really need help right now. I’m having a hard time,” Bryson said.

After they (and you) have calmed down, address why their behavior wasn’t acceptable. You can say, “The way you talked to me hurt my feelings,” or “It’s OK to be mad, but it’s not OK to hurt your brother,” Bryson said. Ask them what they think they should do next to remedy the situation. Should they apologize or clean up the mess they made? Encourage them to identify strategies that will help them the next time they feel angry or sad. Could they take a few deep breaths or go yell in their room? Could they ask you for help or a hug?

You should do what works best for your family, but the psychologists I talked to suggested easing up on punishments right now. “You have to be careful about coming down too hard on children when they’re having a hard time,” Klein said. Bryson agreed, explaining that discipline is really all about teaching, so when you convey to your kids your expectations, and help them problem-solve ways to meet them, you can help shape their future behavior without taking away privileges or giving timeouts. “This is not a permissive approach. You really still can have expectations and boundaries,” Bryson said.

Have fun with your kids when you can. You can also help your kids get out some of their anxious energy in positive ways. None of us has much, if any, extra time right now — but if and when you can squeeze in two minutes of fun with your kids, do it. Put on music and dance with your kids while you make dinner. Make up silly, giggle-inducing bedtime songs. Be sure to let them play — and join in every once in a while.

Play helps kids “process what’s on their minds, what’s stressing them out, and allows them to have some control,” Bryson said. If parents and kids can sometimes be playful together, “that’s going to be so powerful — not only to relieve stress, but to give kids those doses of a parent who’s really connected with them and joining with them in those moments.”

Creating a daily schedule for your kids can help those who crave stability and predictability. You could even pencil in one-on-one play time with a parent, which would give each child something to look forward to. “It really could be like a 10-minute thing,” Chansky said. “You can, in that amount of time, really enjoy and connect.”