“In the highest building in the world, I was well out of my depth”
Roleplaying Johnny English rather than Agent 47 in HITMAN 3
I STARTED MY MISSION IN DUBAI SLOWLY, TRYING TO SOAK IN MY SURROUNDINGS
And it was all going so well, too. I didn’t expect my first foray into the stealthy, outfit-swapping world of Hitman to be so composed as a beginner assassin, but while I’m surprised at the decent start I made to life as Agent 47, I was devastated to discover quite how badly my mission could go wrong.
So, yes, Hitman 3 is the first game
I’ve played in the series. I’ve always found the idea of them a little intimidating, actually. I didn’t believe I had the patience, nor the creativity, to pull off a satisfying kill undetected. I’d heard about the best Hitman levels—beautiful, intricate mazes with opportunity waiting around every turn—and felt impressed, but put off. So, I wondered, with Agent 47’s trilogy set to finish in bombastic
Bond style, did I have the quick thinking necessary to execute my targets while making the most of the exquisite new set of sandboxes?
In short, no. But, as I said, I got off to a good start. Perhaps racing through the tutorial—hand gently held by the game throughout—lulled me into a false sense of security, but it was as I took my first tentative steps into the flamboyant luxury of a Dubai skyscraper that I started to feel a bit more positive. That probably had something to do with Agent 47’s dramatic skydiving entrance and suave outfit change into a smart suit. With orchestral music swelling and the sun’s rays shining, I felt ready.
DUBAI-OUS
So I started my mission in Dubai slowly, trying to soak in my surroundings by picking up nuggets of intel from NPCs and exploring every corner of this resplendent palace. Then, I saw a strangely dressed man arguing with the guards. Assassin instincts I never knew I had kicked in: I waited until he was alone, knocked him out, and stole his outfit. Strolling past the guards, I pinched one of their colleagues’ clothes—what was I ever worrying about?
I picked up more intel, and felt the consummate professional. But, importantly, I discovered a code which revealed an evacuation key card, and then found another the next floor up. I learned that both need to be activated in a short period to initiate the evacuation protocol. Excitement built. I thought my current target, Carl Ingram, could be vulnerable as he escaped. The trouble is, that doesn’t really count as a plan.
So, amid my newly discovered hubris, I initiated the protocol, and everything went to pot. Every guard, obviously, goes on high alert. Even worse, not only was Ingram escaping, but my other target, Marcus Stuyvesant, was too. I did have my security uniform on, but with so many enforcers milling around that could see through my disguise, it wasn’t much use. In the highest building in the world, I was well out of my depth. Impotently, I watched both targets parachute away, surrounded by bodyguards that were armed to the teeth. Oh well, it’s back to basic training for me, then.