‘Christmas Eve gift’ shouts family tradition

“Christmas Eve gift!” That was the routine greeting in my family for generations as we answered the telephone (LONG before cell phones) or the door on Christmas Eve. And, the goal was to be the first to say it!

Grandmother’s mother, MawMaw instilled the tradition in her eight children and Grandmother instilled it in her three daughters, who instilled it in theirs. But, few of my cousins (none of whom live in the South) continue the tradition.

As elder relatives — MawMaw, Grandmother, Mother, my aunt and great-aunts — have passed on, there are fewer of us who continue the tradition, although some of my children tolerate my continuance of it. One of my daughters actually texted shortly after midnight to be the first — which is always the goal.

Modern technology has changed the game with some family members thinking it’s okay to text immediately after midnight. Some think texting, messaging or email “don’t count” and it has to be verbal — either in person or on the phone. And, to be first, basically you have to answer the phone quickly with “Christmas Eve gift!”

In our family, we used to say that the first one to say it was allowed to open a gift on Christmas Eve, but I don’t remember that happening. We just continued the tradition to try to beat others to saying it. The competitiveness can sometimes be quite silly.

Now, just one aunt, who isn’t an early riser, continues it, so her text after 8:30 a.m. didn’t have quite the same bang as the 12:01 a.m. or 6 a.m. texts or phone calls.

It may be a silly tradition. It may be nonsensical. But, there’s something comforting, anchoring about family traditions and as we age and our parents and other elderly relatives die, leaving us as the elder generation, it feels almost as though we’re adrift without an anchor.

Holidays elicit nostalgia.

Nostalgia threatens to overwhelm with sadness intermingled with joy.

A friend just messaged that her sister who was fighting cancer, for whom we’d been praying, passed on. It’s a constant reminder that the longer we live, the more family and friends we’ll outlive and miss.

In attempting to research the origins of the saying “Christmas Eve gift,” I was both delighted and intrigued to find other families who had experienced it and found that the ones who married into the participaters never quite got it. Almost all of the families who participated were from the southern United States and several had different spins on their traditions.

I liked what I read from one person who said that the gift was the gift of themselves — that entering the family domicile with that saying, whether empty handed or carrying presents, was actually announcing that they, their presence, was the gift to be shared.

And, isn’t that really what this time is about — sharing ourselves, our time, our hearts, our homes with one another?

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Editor’s note: Annette Beard is the managing editor of The Times of Northeast Benton County, chosen the best small weekly newspaper in Arkansas for five years. The opinions expressed are those of the author. She can be reached at abeard@nwaonline. com.

It is impossible for those, who believe in the truth of Christianity, as a divine revelation, to doubt, that it is the especial duty of government to foster, and encourage it among all the citizens and subjects. This is a point wholly distinct from that of the right of private judgment in matters of religion, and of the freedom of public worship according to the dictates of one’s conscience.

Edward Ross The Principles of Sociology, Jan. 6, 1833