Get a doctor’s letter to educate boss on perils of nut allergy
Q: My manager has recently started eating nuts at her desk, which is located right next to mine. Unfortunately, I have a serious nut allergy, so any contact with them could produce a life-threatening reaction. Even foods that contain tiny pieces of nuts can be hazardous.
I tried to discuss this with my boss, but she refused to believe me and insisted that the allergy is all in my head. When I explained how hazardous this situation could be, she became very defensive and said I was overreacting. How can I get her to take this seriously?
A: Your manager must either be a narcissist or an idiot. Given all the news stories about nut allergies, it’s hard to believe that she has never heard of this problem. But even if she hasn’t, her callous disregard for your health is absolutely appalling.
Considering the risk involved, you will need to act quickly. The obvious first step is to request a letter from your doctor that confirms the allergy, describes the dangers of exposure, and outlines the precautions you must take. Next, you must deliver this note to your boss in a calm, nonconfrontational manner.
For example: “I know it
MARIE G. MCINTYRE
may seem odd that simply having nuts nearby could be life-threatening. However, my physician has written a letter explaining the risks. I’ve lived with this condition for a long time, and it’s really pretty scary. So even though I hate to inconvenience anyone, my doctor insists that I must avoid being around nuts.”
With any luck, medical evidence will convince your selfcentered manager to become more cooperative. But if not, then you need to find an influential ally in management or human resources who can resolve this issue. Without disparaging your boss, simply describe the problem and ask for some help.
Anyone having a severe food allergy should consider providing management with documentation from a physician. Otherwise, inadvertent exposure could easily turn a holiday party or birthday celebration into a catastrophic medical emergency.
Q: I have recently heard a lot of gossip about my boss having an affair with a staff member. Because I thought he should know what was on the grapevine, I decided to tell him about this rumor. He denied everything and firmly stated that there was no affair.
Now this woman is bragging about her “special relationship” with our manager, so everyone assumes he’s guilty. I suggested that perhaps he should have human resources speak with her and put a stop to this, but he seems reluctant to take any action. Should I go to human resources myself?
A: There are two possibilities here. If your boss is not having an affair with this employee, he might simply be hoping that the rumor will die a natural death. But if this gossip is true, he may desperately want to avoid calling more attention to it.
Either way, sharing the grapevine information with him was appropriately helpful. However, addressing this issue is his responsibility, not yours. So even though your intentions are honorable, it’s time to recognize that this is not your problem and simply let it go.