Big Table is set to bring us together

When Leadership Pittsburgh put out the word earlier this year that it was initiating a one-day event to bring people together over food and conversation, hosts began lining up.

The Big Table got legs so quickly that hundreds of people have an invitation, their calendars marked for April 17.

Several organizations will be super-hosts, setting multiple tables. Some tables are open to the public. Some are combined efforts for cross-cultural exchanges, notably the Northside Common Ministries and the Muslim Association of Greater Pittsburgh.

Hosts can register at lpinc.org/ bigtable. People who want to join a group can find one there. Hosts have two days to meet the loose deadline. There is no fee.

Registration is necessary for Leadership Pittsburgh to collect data from post-table surveys “in order to carry some ideas further,” said Aradhna Oliphant, LP’s president and CEO.

The idea of the Big Table is to demonstrate the value of human connection, she said.

It began with the Chicago Community Trust in 2014. In 2016, the Columbus Foundation in Ohio built the model that inspired Pittsburgh’s debut event.

It is a step toward building stronger communities, in part by building trust. Many of us don’t trust people of other races and cultures. Some mistrust comes from generations of unfair treatment. Some mistrust is based on rumor and stereotypes. We mistrust cynically, defensively, irrationally.

And yet basic human interaction can start the melting process immediately. Breaking bread together is one more obstacle to intolerance.

Big Table hosts may guide the conversations, but they don’t have to be much in it. At an orientation in late February, Ms. Oliphant advised hosts and participants to “trust the people to know what they want to talk about.” There should be food, she said, but what kind, or how much, matters less than the conversation. “Ask yourself, ‘What am I here to learn?’”

Sharjeel Farooq, a Pakistani who came to Pittsburgh in 1998, recently joined the board of the Grayson Center in the Hill District “and fell in love with the program,” he said. He is hosting a table there to bring people “who have no exposure to the Hill District” and to show off the Grayson Center, a nonprofit devoted to the support of youth and their families.

“It will generate interesting dialogue, maybe uncomfortable topics,” he said, “and I think that could lead to something enlightening.”

No one is obligated to go forth with action, Ms. Oliphant said, “but we would love it if every person [at a table] said, ‘Here’s one thing I will do.’”

Whether the table serves breakfast, lunch or dinner, under a tree, in a fire hall or a nursing home, the only instruction is that the eight to 12 people at each table spend 90 minutes being highly present with each other.

“We have task forces and committees to solve our problems,” Ms. Oliphant said, “but rarely do we sit down and talk about something that can lift all of us up, something bigger than the individual, bigger than family — the wider community.”

Super-hosts for this year’s Big Table include the University of Pittsburgh; the Jewish Community Center, Pittsburgh Public Schools; 412 Food Rescue, which is setting tables at public housing sites; the Department of Public Safety, which is setting tables at its headquarters, training facility and at every zone station; and Presbyterian Senior Care, which will invite high school students to join elders around tables at eldercare homes.

Tom Corcoran of the North Side is setting the table in his home and invited me to join the group. I am eager to meet his guests and to listen. His intent is to bring millennials and baby boomers together and to include people from different cultures and a range of work backgrounds, “people who may not meet” otherwise.

“There is so much social media and texting that we seldom make eye contact,” he said. “That makes it difficult to understand other people’s emotions. I also see this as a way for us to expand our networks and team up to bring on change.”

The Big Table is a brilliant, yet simple, idea. So many people have seized on it because we yearn to grow toward others, but most of us are, deep inside, the kids on the sidelines at the junior high school dance.

The Big Table gives us the nudge we need to get out there.