Rivals collide this week (no, not those two)

You might have heard that a couple of bitter rivals will get together on the North Shore this week for the first time in more than a decade.

No, The Fumbler isn’t talking about that college football game being played at whatever that large stadium is called. He’s referring to his personal rivalry with a pair of longtime foes.

Decades ago, The Fumbler ranked at the top of his graduating class in prognostication school. Just behind him were two guys who were then personal buddies of his — Hector the Projector and Victor the Predictor.

But as is the case sometimes, friends grow apart. Little did they know then that a massive rivalry would follow.

Hey, what do you call a rival in picture taking? A foetographer.

Hector and Victor signed big contracts with a national media company. The two did commercials, made personal appearances, signed autographs, and even had groupies. They were stars. Meanwhile, The Fumbler blazed his own trail, opting to join the Post-Gazette and then deciding to be “faceless.” No photos. No fanfare. Definitely no groupies. As you likely know, very few know The Fumbler’s identity, and he hopes to always keep it that way.

Over the years, The Fumbler has been consistently better than both Hector and Victor, which has led to lots of jealousy and animosity. But just recently, the two reached out to your favorite prognosticator in hopes of finally burying the hatchet.

The Fumbler suggested they meet under a curved architectural structure. They are “arch enemies,” after all. But instead, the three will hang out on the North Shore eating ribs and reminiscing about their school days. Here’s hoping it all works out.

The Fumbler was no zero in Week 0, as he went 47-11 (.810).

Follow The Fumbler on Twitter – @FumblerPG

Here are his thoughts on this weekend’s top games:

Laurel Highlands at Belle Vernon, 7 p.m. Friday — There’s a tasty eatery along Route 51 near Belle Vernon named The Red Caboose. It actually looks like a caboose, much like one you would find at the end of a train, only it sells hot dogs and other items inside. Speaking of trains, both of these teams have star “engineers.” That would be bigtime recruits Quinton Martin and Rodney Gallagher. Both will be great, but Martin’s team will be better. Winner: Belle Vernon.

Aliquippa at Armstrong, 7 p.m. Friday — Best ever moonwalker? That’s a debate The Fumbler had with his cousin, The Dribbler, the other day. The Fumbler thinks it’s Michael Jackson, but The Dribbler says Neil Armstrong. How great is it that Armstrong is led by a strong-armed quarterback with a Division I future? Cadin Olsen can really throw it, but The Fumbler questions if Olsen will have much time to throw against a stout Aliquippa front. Winner: Aliquippa.

Avonworth at Central Valley, 7 p.m. Friday — The Fumbler loves that Central Valley has a kid named Mason Dixon. He even ran for a touchdown last week, meaning he crossed the line. The goal line, that is. For those wondering what the Mason-Dixon line is, it’s the line that divides the “you all” from the “youse guys” people of America. And then there’s Western Pa., which is “yinz guys” country. Dixon will help his team win their 29th game in a row. Winner: Central Valley.

Steel Valley at Sto-Rox, 7 p.m. Friday — A showdown of teams that had a combined record of 23-2 last season, this has the makings to be one of the most exciting games of the weekend. There will be playmakers all around with the likes of Dre Miller-Ross, Cruce Brookins and Josh Jenkins on the field. Each team ended the 2021 season with a loss in the WPIAL semifinals, but it says here that Sto-Rox will begin the 2022 season with a win. Winner: Sto-Rox.

And the rest (home teams in capital letters):

Friday

WPIAL CLASS 6A — Tri-County Five Conference: North Allegheny over CANON-MCMILLAN.

NON-CONFERENCE — Albert Gallatin over CARRICK; ALTOONA over Allderdice; FREEDOM over Ambridge; BENTWORTH over Avella; BEAVER FALLS over Beaver; MT. LEBANON over Bethel Park; HIGHLANDS over Blackhawk; WHEELING PARK, W.VA. over Brashear; UNIONTOWN over Brownsville; Burgettstown over BETH-CENTER.

Butler over MEADVILLE; California over CHARLEROI; TRINITY over Chartiers Valley; WEST GREENE over ChartiersHouston; HEMPFIELD over Connellsville; MONESSEN over Cornell; BURRELL over Deer Lakes; GREENSBURG SALEM over Derry; East Allegheny over JEANNETTE; UNION over Ellwood City.

Fort Cherry over CARMICHAELS; MAPLETOWN over Frazier; Freeport over SOUTH ALLEGHENY; Hampton over SHALER; BRENTWOOD over Imani Christian; WAYNESBURG over Jefferson-Morgan; INDIANA over Knoch; Latrobe over FRANKLIN REGIONAL; NESHANNOCK over Laurel; Ligonier Valley over SOUTHMORELAND.

PENN-TRAFFORD over McKeesport; MONTOUR over Moon; New Brighton over HOPEWELL; MARS over New Castle; PENN HILLS over Norwin; Our Lady of the Sacred Heart over ROCHESTER; HARRISON CENTRAL, OHIO over Perry; SENECA VALLEY over Peters Township; CENTRAL CATHOLIC over Philadelphia Abraham Lincoln; Pine-Richland over KISKI AREA.

Plum over FOX CHAPEL; MCGUFFEY over Ringgold; SOUTH SIDE over Riverside; Riverview over CARLYNTON; Serra Catholic over SETON LASALLE; NORTH CATHOLIC over Shady Side Academy; WEST ALLEGHENY over South Fayette; KEYSTONE OAKS over South Park; Springdale over NORTHGATE.

Thomas Jefferson over BALDWIN; Upper St. Clair over NORTH HILLS; APOLLO-RIDGE over Valley; Washington over CLAIRTON; ELIZABETH FORWARD over West Mifflin; STEELTON-HIGHSPIRE over Westinghouse; GATEWAY over Woodland Hills; MOUNT PLEASANT over Yough.

Saturday afternoon

NON-CONFERENCE — Leechburg over SUMMIT ACADEMY.

Saturday night

NON-CONFERENCE — BISHOP CANEVIN over Greensburg Central Catholic; Western Beaver over SHENANGO.