Laugh Lines

Tired of boiling water every time you make pasta? Boil a few gallons at the beginning of the week and freeze it for later. — @swaglordpat

Cooking tip: If you put too much water in your rice, toss a few phones in there. — @Uniquedude2

I tell people that the secret ingredient in my cookies is “love,” but it’s actually “floor.” — @ughrevolution

Cooking tip: Quickly slice a block of cheese by throwing it through a harp. — @markleggett

I hate cooking, but I am excited to debut my cookbook, Toast on a Paper Towel, 365 Ways. — @Lizhackett

Fill your coffee maker with cake mix for an amazingly delicious yet entirely unexpected Thursday morning. — @8989belinda