LIFE in these United States

When our tour group entered a cafeteria for breakfast, the woman walking in with me made a beeline for the carrot cake. But just as she reached for a slice, she thought better of it and withdrew her hand. As she turned away, I heard her murmur, “No, it’s too early for vegetables.” —Betty Rosian Johnstown, Pennsylvania

I was driving with my young twin grandsons when their mother called. As we chatted over the car’s Bluetooth speaker, one of the boys yelled out from the back, “Hey,

Mom, guess who this is? Is it me or Luke?”

After a slight pause, the boys’ mother remarked, “And he’s the smart one.”

—Mary Meillier Coral Springs, Florida

Me, before coffee:

Ugh, why is everyone shouting?

Me, after coffee:

OK, yes, I do see the fire now.

— @RICA_BEE