GETTING EVEN WITH THE ONE YOU LOVE

✦ I know it sounds mean, but when I’m mad at my wife and want to lash out, I open a bottle of some condiment when there’s already one open.

— @Theboydp

✦ I now charge my wife for finding things for her that are in plain sight.

— @Fatherwithtwins

✦ Instead of telling my husband I’m annoyed with him, I’m just gonna put strawberries in a salad.

— @Lizhackett

✦ My husband ticked me off, so I sent him a picture of the thermostat set to 72 degrees.

— @not_thenanny

✦ The next time my linguist boyfriend ticks me off, I’m just gonna say “irregardless” and see what he does.

— @aubviouslynot