Ha, ha, I knew I was right!

Record Observer - - RELIGION -

Did you ever ex­pe­ri­ence a time when you were right and had the ev­i­dence to prove you were right?

I know that for me, it does not hap­pen very of­ten. In fact, I can­not think of a time that it re­ally did hap­pen to me. Well, un­til re­cently. I want to re­mem­ber this in­ci­dent as long as I live.

The Gra­cious Mistress of the Par­son­age was pre­par­ing for our Thanks­giv­ing fam­ily get-to­gether. It takes her weeks to get ev­ery­thing pre­pared; she is so metic­u­lous and will not al­low any­thing to go wrong from her point of view. Ev­ery­thing has to be done just so.

Ex­pe­ri­ence has taught me dur­ing this time of the year to stay out of the kitchen! That is why I am still liv­ing to this very day.

How­ever, it does have its ad­van­tages. I can re­lax in my “man cave” and stay out of her way. I know that if I ever get in her way she al­ways, with­out ex­cep­tion, has a job for me to do. I like work­ing, but not un­der those cir­cum­stances. If she can­not see me, she can­not give me work to do.

One thing she is most fo­cused on are veg­eta­bles. Ac­cord­ing to her, there has to be a bal­ance of veg­eta­bles and the greener the bet­ter.

I, on the other side of the “I Do” aisle, have very lit­tle pa­tience for veg­eta­bles. I was los­ing the bat­tle for this veg­eta­bles war un­til re­cently.

I was hap­haz­ardly watch­ing the news one night when they came out with a very scary bul­letin. It seems that a cer­tain veg­etable (I will not name it be­cause I am not a veg­etable per­son and a veg­etable to me is a veg­etable) was in­fected and giv­ing peo­ple E. coli.

When I first heard that news, I thought I heard it wrong. After all, I have been told all my life that veg­eta­bles are good for you and will not harm you. A healthy diet in­cludes lots of veg­gies. Then they come along with this warn­ing that you should not buy this cer­tain veg­etable.

“Hey, my dear,” I cheer­fully said, “come and look at this news re­port.”

I love mod­ern tech­nol­ogy be­cause by the time she got into the room the tele­vi­sion re­port was over. Very non­cha­lantly, I pressed the rewind but­ton and was able to re­play that news re­port about a cer­tain veg­etable.

I was as quiet as long as I pos­si­bly could be, and then I blurted out, “See, I told you, veg­eta­bles are not all good.”

She gave me one of “those looks” and walked back into the kitchen.

I grew up in a farm com­mu­nity in Penn­syl­va­nia and one of the say­ings my grand­fa­ther had was, “When you have a cow you need to milk it.” And I was about to milk this for ev­ery­thing I could.

I grabbed my cof­fee cup and went out in the kitchen to get an­other fresh cup of cof­fee and when I was there, I hap­pened to men­tion, “I al­ways knew veg­eta­bles could be dan­ger­ous.”

She looked at me and then said, “That is only one in­ci­dent and I’m not sure it’s even true.”

“If it’s on TV it has to be true,” I spurted very sar­cas­ti­cally.

Then I had an idea burn­ing in my head that I had been want­ing to share with her for a long time but never had an op­por­tu­nity. She is al­ways get­ting on my case about my ap­ple fritters, and how harm­ful they were to me. When say­ing that she was al­ways star­ing at my fully de­vel­oped stom­ach.

“There has never been,” I be­gan as se­ri­ously as pos­si­ble, “any news re­port that ap­ple fritters are harm­ful to your health. Cer­tainly, not like this veg­etable on the news to­day.”

She looked at me and smiled, but as I walked away, I could see out of the cor­ner of my eye she was stick­ing her tongue out at me. It feels so good to be right about some­thing and have it col­lab­o­rated by the “TV news me­dia.”

This is a novel ex­pe­ri­ence for me to be cer­tain. It might be the only one so I plan to en­joy it as long as pos­si­ble. Dur­ing the next few days when­ever we crossed paths I al­ways smiled vic­to­ri­ously at her.

At our fam­ily Thanks­giv­ing get to­gether, I no­ticed that a cer­tain “veg­etable” was not on the ta­ble. You do not know how hard it was for me not to men­tion that. Ev­ery once in a while I would glance in my wife’s di­rec­tion and smile. She knew what I was smil­ing about, but just let it go.

I guess that is what mar­ried life is all about. Shar­ing se­crets be­tween one an­other.

Ev­ery time I eat an ap­ple frit­ter from now on, I am go­ing to be smil­ing in re­mem­brance of that “veg­etable.” I am not that ac­cus­tomed to vic­tory and so I was tak­ing ad­van­tage of it. How­ever, I knew I had to be care­ful be­cause some­times things can back­fire. I know this by ex­pe­ri­ence.

I was en­joy­ing my vic­tory at the time, and then I re­mem­bered what the apos­tle Paul said about vic­tory. “But thanks be to God, which giveth us the vic­tory through our Lord Je­sus Christ” (1 Corinthi­ans 15:57).

God has for us vic­tory that su­per­sedes any vic­tory we could have in this world. His vic­tory is al­ways through the Lord Je­sus Christ.

Rev. James L. Sny­der is pas­tor of the Fam­ily of God Fel­low­ship. He lives with the Gra­cious Mistress of the Par­son­age in Ocala. Call him at 1-866-5522543 or email jamess­ny­[email protected] att.net. His web­site is www. jamess­ny­der­min­istries.com.

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from USA

© PressReader. All rights reserved.