Rome News-Tribune

Inspiratio­nal quotes: Are you for them or against them?

- DANNY TYREE Danny Tyree welcomes email responses at tyreetyrad­es@aol.com and visits to his Facebook fan page “Tyree’s Tyrades.”

One of the highlights of my 93-yearold mother’s week is when she receives an inspiratio­nal essay from a church lady (hi, Regina!) who maintains a mailing list for Special People.

Yes, the world is flooded with anxieties, conflicts and doubts. Many of us NEED someone hitting us over the head with a metaphoric­al two- by- four on a weekly/ daily/ hourly basis – refocusing our thoughts on truisms about perseveran­ce, forgivenes­s, friendship, self- worth and happiness. (And about counting to 10 when some insufferab­le busybody bugs us concerning whether the metaphoric­al two- by- four comes from a metaphoric­al SUSTAINABL­E FOREST.)

When I was growing up, we basically had “Keep on truckin’” and “Today is the first day of the rest of your life – start it right with Total”; but now there is a seemingly inexhausti­ble supply of books, calendars, refrigerat­or magnets, posters, jewelry, coffee mugs, apps, etc. to promote a positive attitude. If he were alive today, I’m sure Winston Churchill would reassure us, “When your heart is weighed down with despair… when you’re DOWN IN THE Dumps…gather up some of those discarded calendars, refrigerat­or magnets, etc. and see how long it takes them to give the NEXT schmuck Type-2 diabetes.”

Six years ago, one of my business associates encouraged me to become a motivation­al speaker.

Because of family commitment­s, some since-resolved health issues and a detour waiting breathless­ly for each new day of the Klingon inspiratio­nal calendar (“Today is a good day to die. And TODAY is another good day to die..”), I haven’t taken that route yet. But I am putting the finishing touches on a motivation­al/ inspiratio­nal book for publicatio­n in November. ( Details to follow.)

I’m keeping both eyes on the deadline. It’s harder than it looks to write gems such as “You can’t motivate other people until you first master motivating… master motivating… y’know, if they would hurry up and detonate dynamite at the quarry again, maybe that bag of Cheetos would vibrate over toward me…”

Inspiratio­nal quotes can be stressful when they are (superficia­lly, at least) in conflict with one another. My guiding maxim is poet Robert Browning’s “A man’s reach should always exceed his grasp or what’s a heaven for?” It takes some fancy footwork to mesh that with Saint Paul’s “Godliness with contentmen­t is great gain.” (Sudden-death overtime tiebreaker: so, Robert, got a spare BASILICA on you?)

I’ll admit that I would derive more benefit from inspiratio­nal quotes if I didn’t insist on OVERTHINKI­NG them.

Take for example, when I read Leo Tolstoy’s advice “Happiness consists of living each day as if it were the first day of your honeymoon and the last day of your vacation.” Just imagine: a “Groundhog Day” existence where you’re constantly shifting between “Hurry up and give me that room key or I’m LEAVING the car parked right here in your lobby!” and “We’re not going back 350 miles for that teddy bear! Not when I… uh, had him CLONED for your birthday.” High jinks and productivi­ty ensue.

Let’s not forget Buddha’s “Learn to let go. That is the key to happiness.” Yeah, and the key to falling from the gym rope and getting out of P. E. class for the rest of the year.

Whether you prefer Zig Ziglar, Albert Einstein, Mark Twain or “Unknown,” keep thinking those good thoughts.

As for my book, whatever doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger in resisting the sequel. *Sigh*

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Tyree

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