Hospice volunteer is uncomfortable keeping gift from patient’s family

Dear Abby: For a few years, I volunteered to tend to an elderly woman through a hospice organization. My role was to visit with her while her son ran errands or enjoyed an evening of entertainment. I grew fond of her and her family.

For my 70th birthday, her daughter, son and daughter-in-law hosted an at-home dinner in my honor. It was good fun. In addition to a tasty dinner and homemade birthday cake, there were presents: wine, gag wine glass and a birthday card with a gift card enclosed. The wine is long gone, and I have used the wine glass ever since.

I left the gift card in the birthday card and set it aside. I recently wanted to buy a $20 coffee mug online, so I pulled out the gift card and was shocked to see the value of the card is almost four times more than the mug I fancied. I feel the gift is too much. How do I gracefully return the very generous gift?

— Overwhelmed in Washington

Dear Overwhelmed:

Your heart is in the right place, but please do not reject that family’s gift of gratitude for what you did for their mother — and for them — during a difficult time.

Dear Abby: This is not a big drama, but I think that if someone wants to give out my email address, they should first ask me for permission. I just received an email from an acquaintance telling me they had given out my email and THEN asking me if that was OK. No, it wasn’t! Am I crazy?

— Cranky on Long Island

Dear Cranky: Crazy? Not at all. What your nervy acquaintance did was breach whatever privacy is left in our society these days, which was thoughtless, rude and inexcusable.