Once-supportive wife becomes abusive drinker
Dear Abby: I have been married for 28 years. Last year I was diagnosed with cancer. It was discovered because of a seizure I had at work. They put me in an ambulance, took me to the hospital and did a CT scan, which revealed my stage-4 cancer. Prior to this, my wife didn’t work, while I had a well-paying job. This instantly reversed for obvious reasons.
My wife was extremely attentive. She started taking me to all my appointments and spent a lot of time with me in the hospital on her days off. This was about a sixmonth ordeal, and long story short, when I saw my doctors last week, they announced that after 35 radiation treatments and seven chemo treatments, they can no longer find any visual evidence of the cancer.
Since then, my wife has been drinking heavily and getting angry with me just about every night. I don’t know what’s going on with her or what to do. I don’t want to lose her, but she’s starting to become violent. Could you give me some advice?
Recovering But Confused
Dear Recovering: You MUST NOT allow the status quo to continue, regardless of how much you love her. She should be evaluated by her doctor to see if something is medically wrong with her. And the two of you need to get into counseling right away, and because she can’t handle her drinking, she may need to start rehab or join a self-help group.
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