HOW WE BEAR WITNESS

At the trial of former Minneapolis Police Officer Derek Chauvin, who was ultimately convicted on all counts in the murder of George Floyd, the first witnesses called were the eyewitnesses. Universally, they expressed guilt and shame about their helplessness.

The clerk who initially encountered Floyd and the $20 bill he believed was counterfeit wished he had not shown the bill to his manager. And the teenager, whose video of the incident changed the course of the case, said she’s “stayed up apologizing to George Floyd for not doing more and not physically interacting and not saving his life.”

No one would blame these witnesses for what happened or expect them to have done more. Commentators have rightly lauded them for what they did do to ensure accountability for George Floyd’s death.

In my more than 40-year career as a psychiatrist treating individuals with every type of psychological trauma, it is almost universal that people blame themselves for others’ trauma and/or feel guilt at surviving or witnessing the trauma.

So, what is going on? First, psychological trauma — defined as exposure to actual or threatened death, serious injury or sexual violence — is invariably associated with a deep sense of helplessness. One is no longer in control of events, subject to danger caused by another or the whims of nature. Human beings find this intolerable. It is a core violation of our sense of integrity and ability to control our lives. Paradoxically, the guilt gives the traumatized person a sense of control.

Another factor is hindsight bias, most prosaically called “Monday morning quarterbacking.” In hindsight bias, we know how the event came out, so our later knowledge affects how we view the past event. In trauma, hindsight bias is invariably negative: I could have done it differently; I should have known better; seen it coming; it was all my fault; I made it happen.

Trauma, particularly interpersonal trauma — rape, physical assault, witness to sadistic murder — puts people in an altered state of consciousness: stunned confusion, frozen bewilderment, automatic responding, trying to make sense of and assimilate extreme events as they occur.

The witnesses of the slow, sadistic murder of George Floyd were confronted with a man whose duty was to prevent harm, yet was deliberately, calmly showing them that they were powerless to prevent the harm he was causing

George Floyd — and them as well.

In the aftermath, when trauma survivors review events, even if they are highly distressed, they are in a different state of consciousness than during the traumatic events. They know how everything turned out. They focus on bits and pieces of memory that appear to confirm their negative views of their response.

Traumatic events like the Floyd murder can shatter what are called “just world assumptions”: Things will turn out well in the end; everything happens for a reason; the good guys triumph over the bad guys; evil was defeated.

In trauma therapy, I educate survivors about these issues — intolerance of helplessness and the inability to put oneself back in the mind of one who did not know what was coming next.

Traumatic events like the Floyd murder can shatter what are called ‘just world assumptions.’

I walk them through exactly what happened to see what they were experiencing at the time, what they really thought and did. How were you feeling? What did you understand about what was happening? Step back. Think. You did not know how it would all turn out. I might even ask them, what do you think George Floyd would say to you? Would he condemn any of you? Say that you failed him?

Finally, inevitably, in trauma therapy there is grieving for all the losses; the inevitability of helplessness; the shattering of assumptions; for who we were before everything changed.

No one “gets over” trauma. In the mourning process, survivors integrate the trauma into their autobiography by processing the emotions and the losses.

Bearing witness can be important in healing for those exposed to atrocities, however. Those who watched George Floyd die shared their anguish as they bore witness in the courtroom. The jury bore witness, and found Derek Chauvin guilty on all charges. Bearing witness in this way helps a person to understand and accept what really occurred, who really was responsible, what one’s role really was.

is a clinical professor in the department of psychiatry within the University of Maryland School of Medicine. He wrote this for The Baltimore Sun.