Donna Mae (Ness) Hodgens

1929 - 2021

SAN DIEGO — The sparkle in her beautiful blue eyes betrayed her fun-loving warmth, but if you engaged in conversation with Donna Hodgens, she would pun you to death. She would trade one sly wordplay after another with you until you both, laughing, called a truce. If you were lucky enough to have known her you are bound to have fond memories of this wonderful, warm, happy woman.

Just west of the Red River in Grand Forks, North Dakota, on August 17, 1929, Donna Mae Ness was born into a rollicking Norwegian family of eleven kids - she made it an even dozen. Her grandparents had emigrated from Norway, and both of her parents, Louis and Hannah, spoke Norwegian and English. During her childhood the Ness family felt the pressures of the Great Depression and migrated further to the Pacific Northwest, settling where Louis could find work.

Donna excelled in school, top of her class, but at the time and in the circumstances, college was not an option. She had to work. So, after graduating from high school she went to Bellingham, Washington, to live with sister Bonnie, and find work. There she met a handsome young sailor, Jack Anthony Hodgens, fell in love, married in 1949 just before her twentieth birthday, and formed a union that surpassed granite and steel for its strength, the sun for its warmth, and gold for its endurance. Donna Mae became the consummate Navy wife.

Thus began a life of adventure. They moved often and everywhere, as Jack’s Navy career dictated. Up and down the East Coast from Memphis to Spartanburg, where David was born, to Maryland, Washington, D.C., Boston and Newport. Up and down the West Coast from San Diego, where Mark was born, to Monterey, Seattle, and Kodiak, Alaska. Then on to Rome, Italy, and Stuttgart, W. Germany. She loved the excitement and challenge of travel and never hesitated at a new duty station.

But Donna was more than just a Navy wife. Her family life had taught her resourcefulness and she was a true expert at many things. An outstanding seamstress, she made many of the clothes for her two sons, David and Mark, cutting her own patterns and making her little black Singer sewing machine purr like a kitten.

As a young woman she was a magnificent cook, but as her life and interests developed, she became a gourmet chef. When the Perfect Pan in San Diego had celebrity chefs host cooking seminars, Donna Mae was often the first assistant. A meal at her house was a fete. Jack, Mark, and David always hoped there would be leftovers. As Jack’s career progressed, she, as the wife of a senior officer, played hostess to many dinner parties, and no one turned down an invitation to her table.

She became an expert at Ikebana, the Japanese art of floral arrangement, and worked for years with her instructor in San Diego, creating beautiful, elaborate floral arrangements that were displayed at “Art Alive” at the San Diego Museum of Art. She loved this activity, and every week created floral arrangements to decorate the Bonita Valley Seventh Day-adventist Church. Her blue eyes and fresh flowers welcomed church members as they entered on Sabbath morning and bid them farewell when they left.

In her mid-thirties she taught herself shorthand, out of a book, and became expert at it, so that when her sons were in their teens, she could go back to work to help support her family. She began her twenty-year Civil Service career while in San Diego. She went on to work in the Pentagon in Washington, D.C., and for NATO in Europe, winning multiple performance awards.

She started running for exercise in her mid-forties and didn’t quit until she was in her mid-seventies.

But more than anything, she was Mom with a capital ‘M’. In the life of a Navy spouse there are long periods of separation, often lasting six to seven months. Duty calls. These are tough, but her strength was more than equal to the demands. On long deployments she not only rallied the other crewmembers’ wives, but she was also the only at-home parent to two rambunctious sons. The blue eyes would become steely and stern at times, but the love of her sons was behind the firmness of motherhood, and she was up to the task. She was not a single parent; she was just alone as a parent for long periods of time. We all knew dad would eventually come home with his boundless love and support, but she was the ever-present rock for David and Mark.

In retirement she became a pillar of her church, traveled the world with Jack, and was happily involved daily in the lives of her grandchildren, Tiffany, Brian, Jake and Samantha. She taught them to cook and to bake, and they all treasure her recipes. Her brownies are served at every family get-together. She, with her sparkling blue eyes also taught them to play with words, and now, they will all pun you to death.

Donna Mae Hodgens is survived by her sons, David (Linda Olson) and Mark (Kim Hayashi), her grandchildren, Tiffany (Jason Johnson), Brian (Marissa Yoshida),

Jake (fiancée Gabby Leibbrandt) and Samantha, and her greatgranddaughter, Sierra Johnson. She will join her son, Michael Jack, lost as a child, and her beloved husband and partner-inlife for seventy-two years, Jack Anthony Hodgens, himself just recently departed.

Her life will be celebrated at the Bonita Valley Seventh-day Adventist Church. She will be sorely missed by her loving family and by a host of friends that literally span the globe.

After a full and happy life of ninety-two years, Donna Mae will not just join her husband, Jack. The two of them will be found elegantly dancing together before the Pearly Gates, and when Saint Peter asks her why he should open the gates to them, she will fix his gaze with her beautiful blue eyes and wink. The Saint will grin, pull the gate open, and understand that for eternity, Heaven has just become a punnier place. Goodbye dear mother.

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