IF I COULD HAVE ONE MORE DAY

It took losing my dad unexpectedly five years and four months ago for me to realize he is my hero and the man I aspire to be every day.

Until that fateful day, I appreciated Father's Day like every other holiday we go through year in and year out. I'd go through the motions without really appreciating what it means. My sister and I would take dad out to dinner somewhere or go to the Padres game together, give him a card, tell him we love him and then move on to the next holiday. Then, everything changed when he unexpectedly passed away from a heart attack on one of his long walks along the coast on Valentine's Day 2016. For the first time, I had no dad to spend Father's Day with and instead spent the day in the fog of being a very new dad myself as my first child was born the day before.

If I could have one more Father's Day with him, I would tell him what I admired about him. That he was the most honest man I've ever been around. That I now understand unconditional love and I knew how much he cared for my sister and me and would do anything to help us out at the drop of a hat. I would tell him how much I appreciated all he provided for me growing up and how he set both his kids up for success in the real world and eased the burden so many face when they set out on their own. I would tell him how much I admire the life he lived, his many accomplishments and the sacrifices he made for his children.

I aspire to be like my dad, knowing full well I will never have the resume he did, if you would allow me to brag for a bit. Stephen Allan May graduated from West Point in 1967 and went on to serve 23 years in the Army before retiring in San Diego in 1990. During that time, he served in Vietnam for 30 months, earned two master's degrees from MIT in nuclear engineering and physics as well as an MBA from Long Island University, served as an aide-de-camp to the three-star commander of VII Corps in Germany and then went on to have a very successful civilian career. I could go on and on.

While I will never compete with the life he lived, the one thing I can do is try to be the amazing dad he was and instill the principles of family, honesty and doing the right thing in my daughter.

I was lucky to spend 34 Father's Days with my dad and only now truly appreciate what the day means and what that time he spent with his kids must have meant to him.

I love you, dad.

P.S.: After the decades we spent together watching mostly losing Padres baseball, they are finally good again!

I now understand unconditional love and how much he cared for my sister and me.

May