Woman is ready to end it over politics

Dear Abby: Nine months ago I met this incredible guy and we fell in love. He’s smart, good-looking and has a great career. Six months later, he casually mentioned that we are political opposites. Now I’m not that big on politics, but when I asked him to explain his ideology, his answer was simply to slam the other side.

Is it ridiculous for me to end my relationship based on this? To me it indicates that we have very different morals and values. I made my position on social issues clear from the beginning, but he thinks I’m foolish to worry about things that “aren’t true” and/or “won’t affect me personally.” I feel misled and betrayed, but I miss him a lot.

Principled in Texas

Dear Principled: While some couples can discuss their differences, in your case your “incredible guy” seems unable to intelligently discuss them or articulate the reasons for his beliefs without denigrating yours. Without mutual respect, relationships usually fail.

Dear Abby: I used to take care of my grandparents. When my grandmother died 10 years ago, I took over cooking, laundry, etc. so my grandfather could stay in his home. He died three months ago and left everything to me. I have lived in their house for 24 years.

Now that my grandfather is gone, people say I should move into his (master) bedroom. What should I do with his bedroom furniture? On one hand, it holds special memories. On the other hand, using it will feel like I’m in his room and not my own. It is made of big, bulky, dark, heavy oak that does not fit my style.

Can’t Decide in Pennsylvania Dear Can’t Decide: Your grandfather has been gone only three months, and the rule of thumb is to make no important decisions while you are still grieving. For the time being, make no decisions about what to do with the bedroom furniture, which, although it may be somewhat dated, could be valuable, and someone may love to have it (a relative, an antique dealer, etc.).

For now, move it into the room you have been using, and move yourself into the master bedroom. Allow yourself more time to make your decision, and when you finally do, you may find yourself ready to make some other updates to your property as well.