Deep thoughts, cheap shots & bon mots ...

Can you help a fellow out? I need a story to write. So do my fellow Maytag repairpeople here in the sports department. If you’ve got any ideas, send ’em to the email below. I will reply. No idea too crazy.

Remember the Maytag repairman? That was a long-ago TV commercial. To demonstrate the reliability of Maytag washing machines, the lonely Maytag repairman was seen sitting by his phone, waiting for calls that never came.

Fun fact: One heir to the Maytage fortune, Fritz Maytag, used his inheritance to revive San Francisco’s dying Anchor Steam Brewery, now a thriving local treasure.

Here’s why the Warriors should take LaMelo Ball in the draft, if he’s available, if there is a draft: Ball’s red flags aren’t as red as the red flags of the other guys. Ball’s dad LaVar hasn’t been heard from much lately, so maybe he has undergone annoyance rehab. Also, LaMelo’s brother Lonzo has completely re-engineered his ghastly 3-point shooting stroke, which is no easy feat and might indicate that the family is getting really good basketball advice somewhere.

Sabrina Ionescu and the Oregon Ducks were to the state of Oregon what Stephen Curry and his crew were to the Bay Area when the Warriors hit the playoffs in 2015. Imagine if fate had wiped out those playoffs.

I hope the Giants’ Darin Ruf has found a field somewhere and is riding out the virus storm by hitting baseballs into distant fields.

Somewhere, all 15 of the Giants’ second-base candidates are quarantined together, bonding. Like “The Bachelor.”

Thank you, Bruce Bochy, for supporting my campaign to remove electronics from baseball — except for the scoreboard and the credit card machine at the beer stand. No tablets in the dugouts and bullpens, no video during games. Babe Ruth never studied his swing on video between at-bats. He sat in the dugout eating hot dogs.

Was it coincidence that for Curry’s comeback game last week, the Warriors rocked their “San Francisco” jerseys, and the Chase Center floor sported the “San Francisco Warriors” logo? I’m telling you, it’s coming.

Here’s a suggestion for MLB Commissioner Rob Manfred: Never, ever, ever again refer to major league baseball as “the industry.”

For it’s one, two, three strikes you’re out at the in-dustry!

John Locher / Associated Press Sabrina Ionescu and Oregon’s Ducks deserved way better.

Cassy Athena / Getty Images Would LaMelo Ball be a good fit for the Warriors?

/ The Maytag repairman or a Chronicle sportswriter?